All I Really Want

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Of all the things that you could do,
You did your worst, and you pulled through,
The days are long, the nights are cold,
Knowing you'll never be there to hold,
Above all else, the most painful thing
Is remembering good times, and their endless sting,
We were once so close, yet now so far,
To me you were always the brightest star,
But I grew too close, your emotions turned,
Now here I stand, so badly burned,
Though people can try, they may not understand,
Why it's so hard to heal from your scorching hot brand,
I thought I was worth all the time that we spent,
But the time's now past, my heart's twisted and bent,
There is one question I have left though,
How did you make it so easy to go?
To just let go and walk away,
To ignore my words and refuse to stay,
And the worst part of all? You seem to be fine,
You're heart is so joyful, not broken like mine,
If you truly cared as you used to claim,
Shouldn't your feelings be much the same?
The feeling of emptiness and being alone,
Though friends are nearby, you're still on your own,
Yes times were hard, it was growing so tough,
But were things we once felt just not enough?
That first random text that got us to talk,
The joy in our hearts as we took our first walk,
The day you came by and asked me to dance,
Our first kiss together, and my subsequent trance,
The language of our hands, embracing each touch,
Watching old Disney movies we loved so much,
Running across Six Flags, with no end to the fun,
Picnics by the pool underneath summer's sun,
Celebrating at parties, together you and me,
When you finally managed to make me watch Glee,
Dreaming up Robert James and Cassidy Rose,
Taking pictures at Cantigny in our loving pose,
Going out together, just us at the mall,
Our bonding with friends as we played dodgeball,
Smearing icing on my face and laughing all the while,
All those things that always made you smile,
The smile you used to give to me,
To promise that we'd live happily,
But things have shifted and now you're gone,
Alone, I'm supposed to just move on,
It's just so hard, and no one really knows how,
It seems impossible to live, the way we are now,
It seems like your feelings for me remain only as hate,
Is this the sick joke that some people call fate?
But the truth now is, you're not the one that I miss,
It's having someone there, with happy things to reminisce,
Someone special, whose love I can't conceive,
Someone special who I know won't want to leave,
I wanna be happy, I wanna find something new,
But now I'm so afraid of finding love thanks to you,
'Cause what I learned is I could be happy one day,
And then, by the next, it could all go away,
Then, once again, I'll be stuck in this hell,
My heart as my crime, my mind as my cell,
And the only place I find peace is my dreams,
Someone's there for me again, and her smile brightly gleams,
But I know it's all a lie, dreams offer only a cruel, painful taunt,
Having someone special who'll always be here, is all I really want.





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