I had the brains not to think at all,
Distance myself;
Put up concrete walls.
But through the cracks and over the top,
Dark thoughts crept in,
And severed tied ends.
I tried to outrun this apathy,
But the grudge caught up,
And filled my head with grief.

I’ve learned nothing leads to nothing;
Which is what I just won’t understand.
I’ve got to break it; need to hate it;
Need to shake out of this pattern.

I had the skills not to try at all,
Isolate myself;
In my own little world.
Hid in a crowd; but still felt alone,
Then came the blackened cloud,
Raining past echoes.
I tried to push away these images,
But they’re trapped in my head,
And I’m begging for the end.

But it’ll just keep going and keep going
And keep repeating in my head.
Then rewind and replay in every new day,
Over and over and over again.

I had to try and break through this shell,
Re-align myself;
In my mis-shapened world.
Yet time flew faster then I could run,
And every new road,
Led to a dead end.
I tried to change all my demons into friends,
But the tables turned,
And now I’m right where I began.