My Heart's One Desire

June 13, 2008
By Rachel Hill, St. Augustine, FL

How can I stand here
And watch you smile
And wish it was me
You were smiling at
How can I watch you
And wish it was me
You were thinking of
How can I love you
When I don’t know you
You can make me smile
No matter what I feel
And no matter the day I’ve had
And yet
At the same time
You can drive me
Oh so crazy
What I feel for you is not just a simple crush –
It’s not fake
Or stupid
What I feel for you is real
And it kills me inside
Because I know you don’t know
You don’t know
That you’re always on my mind
And I smile when I hear your name
When you look at me
My heart races
And I can’t breathe
Or think
I can’t talk
Or move
I can’t function
You are the only one
Who can make me nervous
I dream every night
That one day you’ll realize
What we could be
You’re the only one I want
No one else will do
To hear you tell me
I love you
Would make me happy forever
To know that you’re mine
And I’m yours
Would keep a permanent smile on my face
If only you knew
Then things could be different
I can’t tell you
How I feel –
My heart won’t let me
I can’t move on –
My heart only wants you
But what you do to me
Without knowing
Kills me
The way you don’t text me back
Drives me insane
My friends don’t understand
They don’t get how I feel
I don’t get how I feel
Because it’s new
I have never felt this before
Is it love?
My heart doesn’t know
My brain can’t find the answer
So how can I tell?
Is it possible
That maybe there is a thing as love at first sight?
My heart has longed for you
For too long
But I just can’t move on
I can’t sleep –
My dreams lead me to a place
Where we are together
And happy.
What torture
To dangle that in front of me
To rip it away with the morning light
Do you think of me
Do you miss me
Is there anything between us?
So many questions
I need you to answer
But my fear holds me back
So I’m left with a difficult choice
Should I break my heart
And tear it from you
Should I tell you
What I feel deep inside
Or should I keep going on
Liking you without you knowing
Tears roll down my face
You are my heart’s one desire
But I can’t love you
And keep it a secret
Much longer
No one can comprehend
Why I choose to continue
To let myself
Feel this way
But it’s all worth it –
The pain and the tears –
When your name
Appears on my phone
Or in my inbox
My face illuminates
And shows everyone around
That it was you
I don’t know much anymore
But I do know that
I can’t leave
No matter how much I may want too
I have to keep loving you
I know that
No matter what I do
Or who I talk to
Or where I go
I think of you
Reminds me of you
It reminds me of what I can’t have
I hear songs on the radio
Talk about loving someone
And your face
Appears in my thoughts
You have my heart
Though you don’t know.
And for now
You can keep it
There’s no one else
I would rather hold it
And though tears run now
Smiles and laughing will come later
I have faith in that
I have faith in you
I will continue to love you
And hope that one day
You’ll realize that
You hold my heart
But until then
Know this
I will be me
No matter what
Whether you find someone else to love
Or realize I’m here
And loving you
I will follow my heart
And my heart tells me to wait
So I’ll wait
No matter how long it takes
No matter what it takes to get there
I will wait
And while I wait
I will love you
Through the tears
Because you are
My heart’s one desire

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This article has 1 comment.

Meli138 said...
on Apr. 24 2010 at 2:27 pm
Meli138, GP, Texas
0 articles 0 photos 56 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Like a bird with broken wings its not how high he flies but the song he sings"
"Everybody live like its the last day you will ever see tell me tell me do you feel the pressure now?"

This was amazing!!! It was very realistic i liked how you mentioned texting because it makes the piece easier to relate to. Amazinng job! So real...


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