Loneliness…
Should I be feeling it so soon?
I thought this was my sunrise.
Warmth on my frozen perspective.
It’s only a flickering flame on my melted candle.
The heat has been long gone.
I just didn’t want to see it.
My eyes were too clouded with false aspirations.
So why am I still holding on so desperately?
Is this selfish?
I’m pushing him away.
And my fear is carving a hole in my boat.
Floods of remorse bubbling up from the gash.
This water is going to drown me.
Till’ my lungs fill with apathy.
Spilling suicidal regret into my eyes.
Flooding my nose with irresoluteness.
I don’t know which way to go…
But maybe it’s what I deserve.
I was never really…fancied.
They wouldn’t notice my empty seat.
They wouldn’t notice I no longer smile.
I’ll continue to sink.
Sink below the lonesome nooks and despondent crannies.
And lie on the ocean floor.
They won’t find me here.
I still miss the fleeting light of his love.
And the compassion his eyes divulged.
But I don’t know how to swim back.
And it’s getting harder to breathe.
My head is heavy.
And everything is blacker than it was.
…I’m starting to feel…wishy-washy.
Maybe I don’t want thins…
Help, Help me!
I don’t want to die.
I caught a glimpse of his face.
I can’t leave just yet.
Please, someone, grab my hand!
I want to feel the sun.
Pull me up above the surface.
Don’t let me go…