Broken

December 9, 2007
By
It was after much soul searching that she finally spoke.
As she did so she kept her eyes downcast and her mouth partially closed.
She told me that was how it had been in her dreams –
She couldn’t even look me in the eye in her dreams.
She let me know what I had done to her,
Though it was true that I already knew in my heart
Now there was no denying the harm I had caused.
I sat there and listened, her voice echoing off the walls.

She sat with her legs crossed, hands folded, hair veiled
I focused my eyes on the carvings of the wooden table
There were glue stains from too many craft-times gone wrong
The scribbled out lyrics from a sing-along song
Is this where I would end up in my retreat?
This was all I knew before I knew you, my sweet.

I looked up at her, struggling, trying to save us
Trying to communicate how things had changed us
She desperately clung to me, for I was all she knew
I had taken her youth, and though we had our fun
We had taken too much, and now we were done
I left her unwhole and that was something I couldn’t fix
What I wouldn’t do for just one more kiss

I could never leave her, I could never not hold her
I cannot see a life without my lover
Where would I go and what would I do
I’ve never had to live my life without you
I sharply looked up and caught her in my eyes
Her speech was ruined just like that –
Behind her words she could not hide

I found her hand without looking away
And made a heavy promise with light fingertips
I would never forget the way that she kissed
We parted that day, breaking two hearts
But I had broken something much greater
I had broken a promise I believed I would keep
And I had scarred the one I once loved so deep

After that day I’ve never trusted myself again
I wonder how feels my beloved childhood friend.





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