"Her Blood in The Grass"

December 13, 2010
The sun shone down on the world,
shone down bright on the dewy grass.
It was a brand new day-
brand new day with nothing in it but happiness.
The birds chirped and sang down on me,
flew around my head in elaborate dances as I strolled-
strolled through the dewy grass, bathed in sun.
It wasn’t until I walked a little further-
walked a little further and looked down,
that I realized.
It wasn’t a happy, carefree day.
The birds were screaming,
flapping around my head to get me to stop.
The sun was blazing down,
and the dew on the grass was really the sweat
dripping off my forehead onto the ground
as I looked down and saw
her blood in the grass.

The world spun, the earth tilted,
I could barely keep my balance.
I wanted to look away,
look away from the sight that haunted me
for years after that terrible day was over and gone.
But I could not pull my eyes away
from that ghastly sight.
I could not tear my gaze from the horror
that lay in front of me on the green, green grass.
My eyes were transfixed on the nightmare at my feet,
until I realized I was running,
accompanied by a distant, never-ending scream.
Running, running, far, far away-
screaming, crying, trying to get it out of my head.
But no matter how hard I tried,
every time I closed my eyes, all I saw was
her blood in the grass.

Three days later, dressed in black.
Sunny day in late June.
Her body was in a coffin, covered in roses.
I felt as empty as the hole next to me-
empty with no feelings, no more tears.
They closed the coffin, trapping her forever
in that shadowy hell.
It was carried over to me,
carried to the hole where she would be forever,
rotting away in the depths of the earth.
They buried her there, in that god-forsaken hole,
and that was that.
At least until I cam home and went outside,
back to the place where I had found her.
Her body was gone, but as I looked down,
the sun shone through the trees
and illuminated the sight of
her blood in the grass.

It all flashed back-
everything that I had tried to forget
the three long days since it all happened.
I stood there, staring at nothing,
tears streaming down my face,
as I relived that terrible experience
that I had never wanted to think about again.
The sky grew dark with rain clouds,
but still I stood there-
memories running through my mind,
touching down just long enough to cause pain,
then drifting off again.
A splatter of rain drops made me remember where I was,
and I tried not to look down again.
The rain came down harder and harder,
and eventually I looked down to see
the rain washing away
her blood in the grass.

That torrent of rain washed it completely away.
There was no evidence to go with the memory,
and somehow that made it all easier for me.
I honored her memory, remembering and cherishing
all the times we spent together-
happy times, never shadowed by sadness,
never knowing the fate that awaited her.
The memory of that horrible day, long, long ago, still haunts me-
still makes me question why it had to be her,
why she wasn’t allowed to live first-
live a full, happy life of no worries.
That isn’t for me to know, however,
and all I can do is live my life to that utmost degree-
live for myself, and for her also.
She’s always in my heart, and I will never forget her.
And, no matter what, I will never forget
the memory of seeing
her blood in the grass.

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