Hugs in the Light, Kisses in the Day ( And I Don't Know Why)

November 20, 2010

She gives me hugs in the light,
And kisses in the day.
She loves hanging out,
Whenever there's is light.
I told her there will always be,
Because you're a star shining bright.
She loves hearing that I love her.
But hate it in the dark.
She doesn't like to be seen.
Where the sun don't shine,
And I don't know why.


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This article has 2 comments.


on Sep. 18 2011 at 2:31 pm
Floccinaucinihilipilification PLATINUM, Sauk Village, Illinois
34 articles 0 photos 1 comment

This was old...of course lol...n iwasnt dat gud
but please go to
UnitedWorldPoets
its where iput my poems on now.

My name on their is Jackson
please check out some of my poems.....it would be GREATLY Appreciated.


on Sep. 18 2011 at 2:16 pm
billgamesh11 BRONZE, Grafton, Massachusetts
3 articles 0 photos 278 comments

Favorite Quote:
"It's always darkest before the dawn." ~Florence and the Machine

Um, just a bit confused...I think you mean that she won't 'do it' with you? And I'm not sure, but in some places you might have used the wrong form of punctuation. For example, "She doesn't like to be seen./Where the sun don't shine,"

Did you mean to have it be: "She doesn't like to be seen/Where the sun don't shine"? And I don't know what you mean by "But hate it in the dark." But I think that you were heading in a good direction with this, but just fix these errors (if they were errors) if they weren't, just make it more clear for the reader to understand. If you keep writing, you will get better, so Keep on Writing!!!:):):);)





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