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Friday Night
1. The lights shine real bright
the grass is green
I can hear the
sounds of feet running
5. They are after something
I hear the loud smacks
of the hard hits
The flags are thrown
The croud goes wild
10. Take the ball back five yards
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This article has 5 comments.
I would take out the stanza numbers. It distracts from the poem. Crowd is also misspelled, so you may want to consider revising this poem.
Anyway, I like how I didn't know what you were talking about until the last two lines. I had another image in my mind while I was reading this, and only realized that it was about football when I finished reading your poem. The imagery is strong as well, and I liked how you stated that the grass was green. It reinforces the idea and plants a stronger image, though I would still consider revising.
13 articles 0 photos 21 comments
I love this. It totally relates to watching my brother play on the friday nights. Keep up the good work . !
Would you read some of mine . ?