Happiness- to be happy

it's all a hoax
but if it wasn't for books
the stupid looks

Who cares
it's all a hoax

Why bother to analyze
when to fail is to make stronger
but to fall creates confusion for even longer

The perfection of others
lingers in the thought
have they ever felt pain
more intense than what they bought?

For money for them
is like happienss for me

A lot have it
but for me who doesn't
fails to deserve it

I look to disappointment
not for pleasure
but to have sight in whats to come
and to not dewell on what's not treasured

To fake happiness upon peers
expressing a fear in which
creates many tears

Followed by the lack of caring
and no interest in sharing

Leaving you alone

Going from the kid with many smiles
to the person who files away their happiness
to only finding comfort in their frowns

To feel nothing
is to wish you felt everything

But shouldn't I feel lucky?

For those who are new at this
feel their fears and frustrations
in total chaos
surrounding their minds with only the
negative

It can't be controlled
like a plauge that just hit a town

This time it isn't the strongest who survive
it's the ones with the will power

Have you ever found yourself
pondering
on what was-
what could of been-
and what isn't?

I surround my mind
for it's these three simple questions
which cloud my memory
for what now is stays what is