I Sit Alone

December 3, 2007
By Angela Spencer, New Providence, PA

I sit alone
Listening to the rain hitting the roof over my head.
I sit and think.
I think about the past.
I think about the present.
I think about the future.
I sit in silence.
Silence never sounded so loud.
But it gets drowned out by my thoughts,
spinning in my head.
It takes all my self control not to reach for the blade.
Just one cut, just one to stop my pain.
Just one to drown out my thoughts.
Just one to stop my head from spinning.
But something stops me..
Something more powerful than this urge.
And that something is him.
My reason to live.
My reason to breath.
My reason to get up each morning.
This feeling that I had never experienced before.
That feeling is love.
And this love is real.
For once in my life I have someone that loves me for me.
Someone that needs me.
Someone that cares about me.
That is worth more than anything in the world.
So I put down the blade, take a deep breath,
and continue to think.
This time I don't think about the past
or the future.
I just think about right now.
I think about what makes life worth living.
And that's him.
He saves me from myself.

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