darkness

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Curled up in a ball in the middle of a room with tears streaming sown my face. it seems that darkness and sadness are seeping in all the cracks, all the corners, all of the holes. To eventually engulf me in nothing. I yell and scream, knowing no one will never come for me. Knowing no one will never want me. Knowing no one will need me. Eventually I stop screaming for i have lost my voice and curiousness, sadness, and the feeling of death wash over me, making me cringe in pain as they run across my body. The only one that lingered is curiousness, the wonder of what the darkness and sadness would feel like. I reach my hand out into the darkness and watch the black pull at my fingers covering them in black swiftly taking over my hand. Its cold, not a barable cold but the kind of cold that gives u frost bite, so cold it burns like a red hot fire. And yet through the white hot flash of pain i cant pull my hand away, i am filled with fasination. i am fasinated by the pain, so fasinated that i dont notice the other points of blackness, sadness, and nothing start taking the rest of my body. By the time i do notice its too late.... I try to scream again but i am frozen. Not by excrusiating pain, not by horrable curiousness, but by flat out fear. All i can do is sob quietly choking on my tears, untill i am gone. As the last part of me is being covered I wondered why this was happining to me, and to never find an answer to this question almost hurt a bad as the physical pain my body is screaching at. Finally giving into my pain, never really fighting hard in the first place, i let the nothing cover me and the pain seems to dampin or I have just grown acustom, i let my mind go blank as im finally washed away from this earth forever......





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librarylover15 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Oct. 1, 2010 at 9:13 pm
not to be mean necessarily, but to make this better you need more pauses, open ended sentences. you need to make sure your spelling is correst, always read and reread before you post. if you post a post like this again, next time, post it in non-fiction as opposed to poetry to clarify. this does have potential, and i would say to you, just keep working on it! thanks for sharing though, post more stuff soon :)
 
librarylover15 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Oct. 1, 2010 at 9:13 pm
 you need to make sure your spelling is correct** ahahah wow.
 
BriBear replied...
Oct. 1, 2010 at 9:35 pm
:) thanx for the advice... oh and why non-fiction?
 
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