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I am.

sometimes the air around me gets so tight
my lungs constrict, my head feels light.
i need to get out; somewhere i can breathe,
out in the open, where i can fall free.

Nights are the hardest, stuck inside walls
the droning and sighing, the creeks in the hall.
i throw open my windows, chin up to the sky.
Endless stars and darkness and planes going by.

Sometimes i need the grass under my feet
im craving the earth and feeling its beat.
so i lay down, the ground to my cheek.
i give it all up, collapse, i am weak.

And when it rains, when all clouds break
lightning splinters, and the world will shake.
im nothing more than a drop, on a window payne.
I'll lose it all before i learn how to gain.

I'm alive i'm alive i'm alive i'm alive.
i need to remind myself, i can't resist.
im here, im living, i am. i exist.



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