Father

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What can I say?
I used to inhabit the felling of betray
But would not display
These emotions of being alone and lost
Tossed
Away into the frost
Of cold abandonment
The torment
Of knowing your fraudulent
Life put a dent
In my own being
Seeing
You fleeing
With other women
Disagreeing with your disease of
Drinking
True many years ago
We were happy and without woe
In the beginning
You would bestow
Love and fatherly compassion
But as time went by we were no longer in fashion
No longer the apple of your passion
You want what you can’t have
In others you seeked love
Even though it surrounded you on earth and above
Between the bottle and women
We were never good enough to compete
With that
You could never find yourself complete
Always throwing deceit
At us
And it would always repeat
You would tell mom
Never again
Change you have
She was so sweet
And her you go on to defeat her
Cheat her
Deplete her
And when she would leave
You would constantly grieve her
And she was so naïve
She would believe
In you
Trust in your heart
That you could achieve
Eventually she gave up
I would not
I had hope
From many moons I would mope
Where did my father go?
Where is the man that loved me so?
I trembled on the rope
Of hope
Desire to have my happy family back
Trying to deflect all the attacks
On myself
By myself
A dark period
Thanks to you
It took my own strength to cope
You did not pick me up when I was down
Your departure simply mocked me like a clown
And continually tried to drown
Me in my own everlasting sadness
But now I am null
Casting a unemotional glare
At the skull
That is our relationship
Thread that bond us
Waiting for the snip
I cannot forget
How upset
You make me
But I feel you fear to set all free
To make thing right
You fear you own mistakes
And fear a fright
That might
Destroy you
Tonight
I awake
And partake
In the realization
That despite all my frustration
You are my father
Tonight and forever





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