Sailors MAG

May 20, 2008
By Eric Hansen, Barrington, IL

Streaming across the waves
the vessel cracks the sea
It creeps through the fog
Among the misty air concealed.
It doesn’t stir a wave
It doesn’t splash a sound.
The men cannot remember
the feel of the ground.
As days turn into weeks
And weeks turn into years,
The sailors grow resentful
Of the man who steers.
Like a wave in a storm,
Mutiny splashes ashore.
Once the head of the ship
has a head no more.
The crew overthrew but
Had no clue who would do
To follow through as captain –
But land they would pursue.
Like caged birds now set free
They fly up toward the fan
Beams began to burst
And the sinking began.

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This article has 5 comments.

ak92092 said...
on Dec. 10 2008 at 5:27 pm
i really liked your poem, personally i am not a fan of rhyming however the way you incorporated it into your poem is nice

tweedle dee said...
on Dec. 10 2008 at 2:34 pm
um, well i didnt like it, it sounded kinda forced, but it was a great idea and maybe if it flowed beter it would be really good.

cheesy mac said...
on Nov. 24 2008 at 11:34 pm
Wow, those are some miserable sailors. but maybe there should be more to the poem, it needs more and maybe a follow up or a sequel would be nice. It just needs more detail and some kind of tone. But other than that I enjoyed the poem.

sally4th said...
on Nov. 24 2008 at 11:21 pm
its good but to many rymes for do are used but i love the story and great details and metaphores. overall:great!!

Bubblez said...
on Nov. 24 2008 at 6:25 pm
Could be better!


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