Love&Life: My feelings.

May 19, 2008
By Katrina Quates, Aurora, CO

My world, my pain to suffer.

I wake up at night with my thought of you still fresh in my mind,
even among my dreams I find I had to leave you behind.
The shadows dance across the walls as I try desperately to return to sleep, but the wounds that became lonely, are down to deep.
You can feel me still, but somehow hear my cries.
You don't want to listen, but the heart never lies...
The tears my body holds in my heart so tight,
even manage an appearance when I think of you, night after night.
How can I cope, when I can't even cry?
How can I move on, if I don't even want to try?
I'm drowning in myself, my pleasures and my pain,
all manage to make up-one in the same.
I've pushed everyone out, I'm now completely alone.
I can't possibly be hurt if I'm out my own.
I don't need anyone around if I can't have you.
I can take care of myself no matter what I do.


Family once forgotten
A broken family, still, but now I stand alone.
The tears and the pain become normal, my history blown.
Her heart was once made of gems,
This girl, with the future, condemns.
I can't seem to find,
I must be blind.


I'm in love with him.
I can't get over him.
There's no going back now.
I was brought into his life so easily.
Easy as saying I love you.

But that day came and went.
He passed right through my life.
Not noticing he even had a daughter.
He's gone.
There's no turning back now.

I never spent any time with him.
I never went to the movies.
I never noted at him being my father.
I never said I love you.
I never saw him in my life.

I wish I was there for him.
I wish he was still here.
I wish I didn't let him leave me all alone.
I wish I told him I love him.
I wish I had him in my arms.


I think I love you, boy.
Why can't you see this?
I just wanted you to notice me that one day;
but instead, you looked towards your friends who treat you like dog.
I don't want to see you treated like that.
You deserve so much more.
I could give you so much more.
Why can't you see me?
Oh yeah, I'm not real.


I don't know who you are anymore.
You say that you're my friend, but then go and stab that once bloody, shattered spike in my back.
I can't trust you anymore.
That spike had been in my spine one too many times and I can't feel myself move anymore.
There are no thoughts and there are feelings once again.
I can't believe that I once said I loved you.
I can't believed you even said that you liked me more than a friend.
I can't believe that I once believed your lies.
I'm done.
I'm living my life;
For me, not for you.


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