I am standing in the living room
of my dad’s apartment
all around me is white

my mom and future step mom in the doorway
my dad on the couch, playing guitar
my brother and I sitting on the stools in the kitchen

I have a buzz cut, patriots shirt
shorts that my mother made
and I couldn’t stop staring

my mom has brown hair
my step mom has blue hair
“Moms don’t look like this.”

my step mom is talking politely to my mom
and she’s politely responding back
not what I expected her to do

dad looks like he’s listening
but I know that he’s just playing guitar
though I couldn’t follow the sound at all

my brother enthralled with a toy
of course he would be
because it’s not his real father

my mom was surprised
that my dad rebounded so quickly
but she didn’t show that

when my step mom was talking to me
I didn’t hear a single word
I was in a state of shock

I remember riding home with mom
my brother in the back, me in front
thinking, “Moms don’t look like this.”