Do my ears deceive me

Or has a catastrophe

Befallen my legacy?

Some "comic," or, to more aptly describe him,

I would choose the synonym

Revolting, unfunny jerk,

For he delivers my beloved rhymes with a perverted quirk.

He has tarnished the reputation of my endeared Jill,

And made her into something below the station of swill.

He has transformed my dear Peter

Into anything but the pumpkin-eater.

Oh, the effort I put into those rhymes

Which he now makes into crimes.

But this corruption I shall not bemoan

For my descendants have the copyright to prove they are my own.

Thanks to an act of Congress,

They can make him penniless.

It's true what they say,

Every goose does have her day.

See you in court, Mr. Clay.