The Effect of You

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Without intent of waiting for an answer
you ask me about my day.
I hesitate to respond
not knowing which lie to say.

Should I answer as is common?
A simple "I am fine."
With those three words I hide it all,
no truth within that line.

Combine it with a small smile
to mask this burning pain.
Pretending it is easy to see you
when it's pushed me far past sane.

You speak to me as you would any other,
as if we have no past.
You may have already forgotten,
but for me it will not fade so fast.

With every second I must stand
and pretend it is alright
my anger and hurt are clashing
in an internal fight.

Shall I tell you what I think
of how you hurt me so.
The pain your cheating caused,
that I think you should know?

Or maybe go with anger
and strike you in your face.
Put your sorry cheating a**
in it's rightful place.

Then creeps up the burning
the need I hold for you.
My care that runs so deeply,
if only you really knew.

Stuck in limbo I falter
not knowing how to reply
to these voices in my head
knowing I am living a lie.

How can I keep up a strong front
when inside I have broken?
So instead I turn and walk away
before more lies can be spoken.





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