Perfection

June 29, 2009
By camille_1441 PLATINUM, Westerville, Ohio
camille_1441 PLATINUM, Westerville, Ohio
31 articles 0 photos 48 comments

Perfection
Skinny body,
Perfect nose,
Long blonde hair,
Expensive clothes,
Sexy boyfriend,
Careless mom,
Man she’s got it going on.
She can party till 6am ,
She’s got all the coolest friends,
She hangs out with the awesome band,
She’s always got something planed.
Dancing,
Dating,
Acting cool,
She doesn’t really care for school,
She comes home past law curfew,
She has drunk, took back a few.
Her boyfriend pushes down the door,
She doesn’t really care anymore,
He abuses but it’s all right,
So she’s not gonna start a fight,
He leaves her crying on her knees,
But she has always aimed to please.
No ones home to ease the pain,
To make the past just melt away,
She’s the prettiest in her school,
She makes all the hot guys drool,
People stop and stare and think,
“She really does have everything.”
Skinny body,
Perfect nose,
Long blonde hair,
Expensive clothes.
She comes back to an empty home,
No one there to call her own,
Perfection seems it be the way,
Perfection in her bed she lays,


The author's comments:
this is a poem I wrote about a girl who is obviously a misunderstood popular girl who lets her boyfriend abuse her and rape her because she doesn't really have anyone to love her. The episode inspired me to make something that is hopefully meaningful. As always please PLEASE comment I love to hear your opinions

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This article has 2 comments.


on Jan. 25 2010 at 5:44 am
ShernayB. DIAMOND, Southfield, Michigan
62 articles 1 photo 881 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Some things will never change"---Tupac

I love the idea of this.

It has a powerful message in it.

Keep writing hun.

EdytD SILVER said...
on Sep. 3 2009 at 8:50 pm
EdytD SILVER, Livingston, New Jersey
6 articles 0 photos 258 comments
Really great idea. I think you've got a lot to work with here, but I think it's got a bit too many cliches of the "perfect girl." Instead of saying, long blonde hair, for example, describe the way it swirls in the wind -- something the reader can see, but something that gives them a different way to look at the perfect girl at school.


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