Can't Let Go ..

April 18, 2009
By Anonymous

Days seem to pass by quickly
it seems my future is a second away
the pain is eating me alive
its killing me day by day
i didnt get to say goobye
just stand there regreting every mistake and cry
im sorry for everything mommy
for every worry and tear i made you drop
ive still screwed up
but i promise to try and stop
i love you and i wanna make u proud
so with joy up in heaven you can shout
"thats my girl"
its amazing how wherever i go
theres a memory
of you and me with the family
theres happiness but at the same time sadness
cuz i took you for granted and now
i am motherless
i dont know where i am going
but no matter how hard i try to hide the pain
i know its showing
in my arms, in my eyes, the way i talk
i know everyone knows
that i just cant let you go
cuz if i do that its accpeting that your truly forever gone
i just cant do that
its too hard
the worst part is watching the lil ones cry
having to lie and say "everything will be allright"
when i know its all just a big lie
pretend it doesnt hurt
try to be strong
fool everyone by saying "nothing is wrong"
when the truth is i cry myself to sleep
hoping i see her at least once again in my dreams
i dont wanna pretend
but its the only answer
i wanna think of this as a horrible nightmare and im
just waiting for it to end....

The author's comments:
I wrote this Thinking of my mom ...
may she rest in peace...

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