What's it like to really feel loved?

July 28, 2009
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What is it like to really feel loved?
I don't know the feeling,
but I tried to make myself believe I was.
I got turned on by the people I loved and cared about most.
I got turned on by the guy I fell in love with.
Now I'm called a fake, a liar, stupid, and an attention seeker.
That's not me,
but everyone is starting to seem to think so.

I have my best friends now,
and I have my boyfriend,
but nothing seems right anymore.
Months of friendship,
just thrown out the door.
I try to forget,
but it's just so hard.
Mostly when all you hear is their names.
Mostly when you find out he loves on of your best friends.
"Laura, Michael told me he is in love with me."

I cry in the middle of the night,
wondering why this happened.
Was it for the best?
I don't think so.
I want it all back.
I want to go back,
I want to start fresh.
From the begining.
Fix all the things I did wrong.
Make it so I don' screw up.
Because I wanna know,
What is it like to really feel loved?

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xXsmileXx This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Aug. 5, 2009 at 2:24 am
Wow. This is like a repeat of my entire school year. We all wanna go back and fix something don't we? Good job. And keep writing!
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