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broken bridge

Secrets unsolved.
worlds revolve.

love crashes as i
pick up the ashes.

feel the pain as
our love is stained.

Walk the bridge of
broken wood. I'll take
you to where i once stood.

By your side, i will survive.
breathe your air, i will prepare.

Feel depressed, i can confess,
love burns a hole right through
my chest.

My hearts still pumping, i can hear it thumping.

There's one thing i know that i can declare, that love is true it doesn't have to be fair.



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This article has 6 comments. Post your own!

EdytD said...
Sept. 1, 2009 at 12:13 am:
Interesting; I like the rhyming. I think that some lines have really good graphic imagery, especially "love is stained." I think instead of saying that you feel depressed, you could instead describe your depression - your face, your feelings, using imagery and/or metaphorical language that the reader can really relate to.

Great job!
 
mallory14 replied...
Sept. 2, 2009 at 6:50 am :
Yeah thanks for the comment. I have also been looking at your poetry and it really is good. And about the depressing poems...it's just easier to write them and they all relate to my life and It takes me a longer time to think of happy poetry but thanks for the tip feel free to look at my other ones :) thanks
 
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Tears2Roses said...
Aug. 21, 2009 at 10:30 pm:
Amazing so sad (what is it with you and sad stuff? Just kidding i writ sad all the time!) GO SORROWFUL LOVERS!!!!
 
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Hope_PrincessThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Aug. 20, 2009 at 1:53 pm:
I absolutely love this poem and it's written in a such a special way all your own. Keep writing!
 
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musicgirl757 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 31, 2009 at 2:50 am:
Ohhh, nice! I like it! Very deep and sweet. Honestly this is very cool and written in a nice artistic way. I like it alot!
 
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GlassHeart said...
Jul. 29, 2009 at 10:54 pm:
Good job.
 
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