Chamber

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My mind is a chamber,
A chamber of thoughts,
Memories lie in a cell decaying,
The odor intoxicating,
Unusual.
The aroma creeping through the air,
Brushing my nostrils,
Slipping into my mouth,
Forcing words to come through,
Anger.
Words of pain and sheer misery,
Mocking me,
Digging into my heart,
Tearing it up piece by piece,
Hatred.
Breaking me down,
Shredding what I have become,
Down to who I used to be,
Bringing the memories into my reality,
Life.
What once was, is,
Merely a dream was that strong person,
The person that had magnificently escaped,
Or did she simply try to forget but still,
Stuck.
Suddenly a familiar breathe meets mine,
Whiskey masks the identity of the person though,
Hides the true personality,
Bringing out something different,
Monster.
Now a moist, cool breathe,
Is the only thing to come out of my mouth,
No more words are able to be exclaimed,
Silence overwhelms me,
Unbreakable.
Looking deep into the eye of this stranger,
Deeper than the deepest of all seas,
Where chains have locked the soul,
And this person lay almost defeated,
Broken.
A person shattered like a glass vase,
Being stepped on by close ones,
No one to help pick up the pieces,
Simply letting the glass pierce their skin,
Scarred.
But, the whisky has sang a lullaby,
Putting away the agony,
Temporarily mending the pieces,
Taking over their mind,
Hypnotized.
Words seep and slur out of their mouth,
A voice so recognizable,
Yet impossible to figure out,
For the words have no relation,
Different.
‘Explanations’ for who they are,
‘Reasons’ for the nightly lullaby,
Absorbing every word,
But not believing them at all,
Excuses.
What stranger explains is my life,
Older times and different people,
All in all no differences at all,
This person has lived a life like mine,
Hurt.
They have lived a life of a prisoner,
A prisoner of their own mind,
There are ways to escape,
Nearly impossible to find,
Nearly.
This person, this woman,
She has given up the search,
The song was too sweet,
But I, I am different,
Determined.
The chambers of the mind are lonely,
They are like a twisting and turning maze,
There will always be an end,
But it seems forever until found,
Time.
Those who do not find their way,
They are the most sane people,
The ones who are simple,
The ones who do not look for meaning,
Shallow.
Those who have gotten away,
Insanity runs through their veins,
These are the happy people,
The ones who see the meaning of things,
Depth.
Shallow will let people slip away,
It will never love,
Never know how to care,
How to show compassion,
Idiocy.
Depth will invite more people in,
It will know deep compassion and love,
Understand the balance of things,
Realizes the beauty in everything, even simple,
Intelligence.
This woman is shallow,
She does not see the beauty in anything,
She does not dig into painful thoughts,
Simply tries to erase them,
Foreshadow.
No, not I,
Progress is upon me,
I have jumped head first into my thoughts,
The first step out has been taken,
Truth.
My mind is still a chamber,
A chamber of thoughts,
Memories lie in a cell decaying,
The odor intoxicating,
Unusual.





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