I never used to dream. I used to lie awake for hours staring at the ceiling looking for familiar shapes in the ripples and bumps of the paint until I was waking the next day in the sunlight shining in from my open windows.

I never thought twice about this. It was just a routine I had settled for. But then I found you, and the routines left. I no longer looked for shapes on my ceiling but for your name on my caller id. I no longer fell asleep from tried drawings but stayed up wishing we would keep talking until I drifted off on the phone listening to your voice.

I started saying yes to going out and staying late. I started waking up to dreams that I left because you were the only person I would want to wake up for. Dreams of your arms being wrapped around me, and me pressed in tight, never close enough. I never used to dream but you gave me something to look forward to, something to want.

I never used to dream and now I dream all the time. Your face; your smile; our lips. I never used to dream.