The Greatest Guilt

I shut the door behind me, closing the space between us.
You’re on one side, I’m on the other.
Every day, a new feeling, a new picture of what I’ll miss.
I said goodbye in anger, yet I can’t go back in anger.
It’s over.
I thought leaving you would make things easier.
But it’s just cut off my healing.
You told me you wouldn’t cry when I left, that you wouldn’t care.
But it’s me, not crying, not missing, not remorseful… yet.
And that’s the greatest guilt I bear.
I picture you every night, eating your dinner alone,
Doing something to occupy your time without me.
I always see tears down your face, but really?
There are none.
We’re not family anymore.
And that’s the greatest guilt we bear.