Tears

May 25, 2009
By SilverDawn GOLD, Burnaby, Other
SilverDawn GOLD, Burnaby, Other
10 articles 0 photos 298 comments

As I sit alone listening to sad songs
I try to figure out all of my wrongs
A drop of tear slides down my cheek
But crying just shows that I'm so weak

I must continue to stand strong
I'll write my own heartbroken song
I'll sing the words of my heart
You and I can't be too far apart

How'd our story come to this end?
It was just starting to extend
And it was so sudden and unexpected
My soul crushed as I was rejected

If only I could rewrite our romance
If only you'd give me just one chance
If only you'd see me for who I am
You'd understand I'm not one of them

I'll still hold on to you for awhile
To prove that I might be worthwhile
I'm not as shallow as they were
I've got nothing to do with her

My heart refuses to let you go
I love you too much, you should know
You tell me that you like me too
But I wonder if it's really true

We're strangers now, nothing more
Leaving my heart hollow and sore
Deprived of the love I have given out
That I shall have to live without

The sun and moon rise and fall
And I throw my empty heart at the wall
Tears stream past my barricade
Because my love for you will not fade.

The author's comments:
I wrote this about a boy I like who's afraid to love me back. He was hurt badly after his first date and he thinks that I'll hurt him too. If only he'd give me a chance..

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This article has 51 comments.


on Jun. 30 2010 at 5:44 pm
ShenelleCrystal SILVER, M, New York
7 articles 0 photos 186 comments

Favorite Quote:
Laugh your heart out dance in the rain cherish the memories ignore the pain love + learn forget and forgive because remember you only have [one life to live] ♥

This is amazing  great job ! keep it up please come and check out my work when you get a chance :) it would mean so much

YS1112 said...
on Mar. 31 2010 at 6:55 pm

Amazing!

Totally Relatiable!


on Mar. 8 2010 at 4:12 pm
WanderingChild13, Riverton, New Jersey
0 articles 0 photos 12 comments
BEAUTIFUL <3

Kite112211 said...
on Dec. 12 2009 at 1:48 pm
OMG ur really amazing.. i absoultely luv it.. u really wrote from ur heart and the words.. Wow their reallty good, it was expressed in the best possible way... i really pray that ur poem get into the hearts of the ppl of the world because it deserves soo much more..

"totally exquizite"

Kampai Kite

on Dec. 12 2009 at 12:10 am
katie_bugg GOLD, Scott Depot, West Virginia
14 articles 14 photos 34 comments

Favorite Quote:
"But my heart, it is brighter than all the many stars in the sky"









-Edgar Allan Poe

wow. this was breath taking i read it over and over again. It holds so much meaning to it. Absolutely beautiful. amazing work. one of my favs...

on Dec. 11 2009 at 9:01 pm
Love_Baby SILVER, Wyoming, Michigan
5 articles 4 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."
"True love waits."
"If it made you smile never regret it."
"Not everyone's a supermodel."

Your an amazing writer. Be sure to let me know whenever you post new stuff.

on Dec. 11 2009 at 7:10 pm
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM, Dearborn Hts, Michigan
24 articles 16 photos 644 comments

Favorite Quote:
You were born an origanal why die a copy?The secret to success is the consistency to pursue.To the world you may be one person,but to one person you may be the world.To receive the right answer,you must ask the right question.Don't worry be happy! :)

Wow...I have chills...amazing...u captured so much emotion...u could feel true sincerity behind every word...wonderful flow n ryhme:))

on Dec. 6 2009 at 5:06 pm
abooga.looga SILVER, Covina, California
5 articles 0 photos 14 comments
memories rush to mind as i read this.

on Oct. 3 2009 at 9:23 pm
Brokenlover GOLD, Albany, Oregon
11 articles 0 photos 23 comments
This is so amazing!

You can ryhme which is something I try to do, and fail:)

utterlyamazing.

on Sep. 14 2009 at 8:19 am
MiuBlaze BRONZE, Upper Darby, Pennsylvania
3 articles 1 photo 7 comments
Hey, I loved this! Awesome job, really. It's cool how you managed to get every two lines to rhyme. I tried that once, never worked...stopped by the fourth line.

Anyways, hopefully whoever this is about decides to give you a chance!

EdytD SILVER said...
on Aug. 25 2009 at 12:52 am
EdytD SILVER, Livingston, New Jersey
6 articles 0 photos 258 comments
wow, this is fabulous! The narrator's pain is clearly shown in the poem.. I have a friend who is also afraid to get into a relationship, and the problem is, it won't be fun if he/she is too nervous to let it be.

It's a great poem, and the pain of the narrator is shown clearly through the words. I love it!



Thanks for the comments on my poems! :]

on Jul. 26 2009 at 7:38 pm
one_of_a_kind_girl GOLD, N/A, California
16 articles 0 photos 58 comments
"Tears stream past my barricade

Because my love for you will not fade" those were my favorite lines. The whole poem was very well written. I love that style of writing, where each stanza is full of couplets. I write a lot that exact same way. It's tricky getting the rhythm right AND being able to describe a meaningful passageway to your feelings, and you combined both of those very beautifully. Oh, and thanks for the comment on "What im going throught". i really appreciate it.

on Jul. 20 2009 at 11:37 pm
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.

thank you so much for the comment on my "i think of you" poem. :) i love this poem.

SilentQ said...
on Jul. 20 2009 at 6:32 pm
SilentQ, Glendale, Missouri
0 articles 0 photos 21 comments
Makes me wonder... nice poem :)

on Jul. 20 2009 at 4:23 pm
Inkspired PLATINUM, Whitby, Other
26 articles 0 photos 493 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If one will scoff at the study of language, how, save in terms of language, will one scoff?" - Mario Pei
"I write for the same reason I breathe - because if I didn't, I would die." Isaac Asimov

Beautiful. Very heart-wrenching. You have created a masterpiece, it rhymes well and the rhythm is great.

on Jul. 13 2009 at 1:53 pm
despurlock DIAMOND, Morgantown, West Virginia
79 articles 0 photos 179 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The heart has its reasons which reason does not know." -Pascal, Pensees, 1670

"My heart refuses to let you go, I love you too much, you should know." is my favorite line. You did a fantastic job of pouring your heart into this poem, I love it! Thanks for your comment on my poem! I really appreciate it! Please come by and read some more of my work, thanks so much! Keep up the great job!

Erin said...
on Jun. 27 2009 at 1:36 am
love it Carrie :)

good jobbb :)

YAY!!!

Rav said...
on Jun. 25 2009 at 7:02 pm
WOW, thats rly good

on Jun. 25 2009 at 5:58 pm
myluvsong182<3 BRONZE, Harmony, New Jersey
1 article 0 photos 5 comments
aw man, i read this a few days after mine left me :( :( it totaly relatable...good job :)

caarmmen(: said...
on Jun. 25 2009 at 1:37 am
Omg!!!

good job carrie !

wonder who this poem's dedicated to?


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