Notions of Life

May 24, 2009
Custom User Avatar
More by this author
The world has lost its luminance with my growing age,
What has become of me with every little change?
I feel like a bee trapped in a colourful canopy.
It’s known to me that it’s all false,
Your love and all those fake calls.
It pains to think such could have been the destiny,
I am distraught at present, and seek melancholy.
Days have passed and nights have died,
I wait at the window for the unknown.
I know there is something which is keeping me alive.
I know not why or how would I survive.
But so far I have managed to withhold.
All the urges and despair,
my tears have dried after all this while.
I do believe in the strength and wisdom,
It perseveres in one little corner deep in my heart,
The sacred corner I worship with all I have.
But just at times I feel the loss- and disregard my life.
Oh my soul! Let me live,
Let me live until I can stand no more,
Then you may take all the pain away,
cus that’s what you want.
I am ready to serve you,
once I have pleased my entity in this world.

Join the Discussion

This article has 7 comments. Post your own now!

xXxFallingTearsxXx said...
Jul. 2, 2009 at 5:11 am
awsome job on this poem!!! i really love this it, it's just so amazing. keep it up!!!
Kite112211 replied...
Dec. 12, 2009 at 1:59 pm
AHHH so amazing i really luv it like it is my child.. hope the world experiences this angel...
Richa said...
Jun. 15, 2009 at 10:26 pm
Thanks Hiba and Nayr139, your comments did help me gain more confidence to write better.. :)

Yes bluejay I thought so too abt the flow once i was done writing the poem..but it was too late..didnt want to change the feel to it by changing words..but surely you'll find better flow in my forthcoming poems..thanks for your analysis =)

amyxu, thanks for your views on the poem..i did not intend to make it sound like a rap thought amused i had never re... (more »)
amyxu said...
Jun. 15, 2009 at 7:13 pm
Insightful. At first, with the rhyme scheme and the meter and all, it kind of sounded like a rap song (no offense, that interpretation was probably just me!). I like the thought-provoking themes incorporated into this poem.
bluejay31 said...
Jun. 2, 2009 at 1:07 am
Hey, this is really good. I really enjoyed it...but I do think that you needed to add more flow to it. But overall, I enjoyed it! :)
Ryan M. said...
May 30, 2009 at 1:59 am
I really like this. Great job.
Hiba S said...
May 30, 2009 at 1:07 am
woww mindblwing....superb!!!
dnt hv the wrdz to express how gud it is!!!
gud wrk richa!!
Site Feedback