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Trapped

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Trapped behind these walls
Closed inside this room
Is a girl who has a secret
Leading to her tomb

Thoughts running through her mind
Pain racing through her veins
Gives her trouble through the night
As the sky begins to rain

These rooms has no windows
No air, she's suffocated
These rooms have no light
The intensity not yet rated

Trapped inside this world
With hearts burning cold
Dawn begins to break
The air brisk and bold

She opens her mouth to speak
You hear not yet a word
For its trapped behind these walls
Isn't it absurd?



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This article has 17 comments. Post your own now!

iWriteToExpressThouqhts said...
Aug. 25, 2010 at 3:47 pm
wow this is really good work ! I ♥ THIS ! please check and rate my work =]
 
ShernayB. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Aug. 25, 2010 at 3:50 pm

thanks hun. 

I sure will.

 
xBaByGiRrL22x said...
Apr. 17, 2010 at 2:04 pm
omg i luv  this. it is amazingg
 
_TheDarkArtist_ said...
Apr. 15, 2010 at 6:18 pm
This is amazing. its goes deep. keep it up, i will be eager to read more :D
 
Moonbeam13 said...
Apr. 12, 2010 at 6:04 am
Wow..... I feel exactaly like this.
 
Chelsea G. said...
Apr. 11, 2010 at 12:19 am
awesome! i really love it! please keep writing 
 
bilbogirl said...
Apr. 2, 2010 at 7:12 pm
Fantastic work! You are a true artist, painting with words. I love this poem
 
ShernayB. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Apr. 2, 2010 at 10:07 pm
Thank you so very much.
 
Smileyj789 said...
Feb. 27, 2010 at 4:15 pm
This is such a beautiful piece of work. It is intense, and i can relate. thanks 4 all the great comments on my work:) you are an extraordinary writer!
 
ShernayB. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 27, 2010 at 5:37 pm
Thank you.
 
alex9426 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 31, 2010 at 6:25 pm
i love love love how you use rhyming in your poems. it really brings a new meaning to them. this one, i think, is my favorite so far
 
tbkeleli said...
Dec. 26, 2009 at 8:30 pm
ohhh this poem is very intense. and i like the words used as well. they help add to the intensity
 
iluvfruitbasket3 said...
Sept. 16, 2009 at 5:22 pm
amazing! the feel of the poem is intense
 
Ineedthesuntorise said...
Jun. 13, 2009 at 3:28 am
Hey I have no criticism for this poem-it is just too amazing! I love how much emotion you put into it! its soo real and it really connects with me. :)

if you want, you can also check out my poetry too-i love constructive criticism too-but you dont have to read them if you dont want to of course :)
 
LilJ<3 said...
Jun. 8, 2009 at 12:00 am
I absoultely loved it. Your a great writter and i love the flow of the poem.. OH thanx for the commebts on my poem, i too like constructive critism...keep writting im sure to keep reading :)
Jackie<3
 
PK4evr This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jun. 4, 2009 at 2:20 pm
You like constructive criticism, but there's one problem- I have no criticism. LOL. It was that good. :). Keep writing.
 
MariaMarie This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jun. 2, 2009 at 12:28 am
I like how you pool the reader into it by asking the question last- makes them feel what you've just said, to take it in. I like how you tell us about her and not give direct details.
 
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