Untouchable

I stare deeply into your shining, blue eyes and yet,
I can't grasp any claim to their untouchable beauty.
I am too afraid, too shy to reveal my secret obsession in the childish fear of rejection,
Because with rejection, I can no longer lie to myself,
I can no longer hope that one day you'll feel it too.
But still, I can't stay here, waiting for you.

However so kind you treat me or however so sweet you smile my way,
If you do not feel for me as I feel for you,
My heart will burn forever in hellish flame
As my mind plays back the "should haves" again and again.
Please, stop tantalizing me with your kind words and shining eyes.
Expose me to your love, or tell me lies.

Yell mean things at me.
Call me fat, ugly, stupid.
I cannot bear being your friend.
I am too selfish; I want far too much.
Hate me or love me or torture me as you do now,
For my heart burns from the love I feel when you are around.