Letter to a Mask From a Friend

May 16, 2009
By camille_1441 PLATINUM, Westerville, Ohio
camille_1441 PLATINUM, Westerville, Ohio
31 articles 0 photos 48 comments

Dear You,
Do you know who you are?
I know you’ve been searching
So near and
So far.
You’ve tried on a mask that was covered in black.
It’s face sad and weepy,
It’s face sort of cracked.
You tried on a mask in Chantilly lace,
Although it was beautiful
It wasn’t your face.
How about the one with the pom-poms and bells,
Whenever you’d wear it you’d laugh and you’d yell.
You acted so silly, you acted so strong
But all of the time you were just acting wrong.
My favorite was the one that wore a big grin,
Plastered and white dropping down to your chin.
It giggled, it laughed it had a good time,
But under I knew you were hiding inside.
There’s a secret inside you, deep down within.
Under the mask hides you’re very own grin,
Under that mask hides your very own frown,
Under that mask hides a cool, funny clown,
Under those masks hides wonderful you.
The person I love,
The person I knew,
Dear You
A Friend
Take off the mask,
Because once you do I know your coming back.

The author's comments:
This poem is obviously about a friend who is trying to tell her friend to be his or herself. As I always say, any comments and feedback are appreciated! =) your comments good and bad make me love writing for you!

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This article has 3 comments.

iwantcoconow said...
on Sep. 26 2009 at 1:37 pm
iwantcoconow, Bronx,ny, New York
0 articles 0 photos 81 comments
really good

on Jun. 22 2009 at 6:58 pm
ShernayB. DIAMOND, Southfield, Michigan
62 articles 1 photo 881 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Some things will never change"---Tupac

Okay. This one is very good. The rhyming flow is excellent, you mastered that. I know that it would help if you give constructive criticism to your fellow peers or writers on this site, but I cannot really pick out anything wrong with this piece. I think the last line is okay how it is. Perfect. Although the word "your", supposed to actually be "you're"; so it sounds like "I know you are coming back. Other than that common mistake, I think this piece is wonderful. Good job!

amyxu said...
on Jun. 15 2009 at 7:08 pm
Hey, I liked this one a lot too. One line that didn't quit fit, in my opinion: "Because once you do I know your coming back." The first part is ok, but the "I know you're coming back" is a little bit off-topic. Maybe it could be "I know the real you is coming back" or something about the true person within. Otherwise, I really liked this poem. Keep writing! :)

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