It’s spending math class running through combinations in your head
It’s spending two and a half hours a day after school rehearsing
Finding embarrassing sweatstains on your leotards
Feet: cracked, dripping with blood, bruises growing like flowers on your skin.
It’s leaving one studio, only to be stuck in another
Spending the few hours you have to yourself
Practicing in hopes of not embarrassing yourself
When you only embarrass yourself practicing
It’s laying in bed but not resting
Your muscles forever tense
Running through the motions in your sleep
It’s eating, sleeping, and breathing dance
It’s wondering everyday if you’ve worked hard enough,
And if you’ve done everything you can to look like that special dancer
The one they can’t peel their eyes from
Its showing up and being let down,
Its showing up again because you know you can work harder