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Without Control

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God grant me the serenity
I woke before the sun this morning. In the darkness of my room, I could see the phone flash as my morning alarm rang. It is cold outside my covers. Give me one more hour, even two, and then I will be ready, but not now. The song plays once, twice, three times, and I am finally out of bed.
To accept the things I cannot change;
I walk to my bathroom. It is only a couple feet away. I turn on the shower making sure the water is hot. And though I am out of bed, my head is still dreaming, finishing another story that was interrupted by the darkness.
Courage to change the things I can;
My room is covered with clothes, but I manage to find my outfit. Skirt on the floor, shirt in my closet. It always matches. Back in the bathroom, I deal with the rest. Hair and makeup, nothing special.
And wisdom to know the difference.
Upstairs is quiet except the meows from a cat or two. I pour the bowl of cereal, and eat in silence. I’ve read this cereal box yesterday; the nutritional facts haven’t changed. I look at the clock; the time to go has passed. I am late.
Living one day at a time; enjoying one moment at a time;
I grab my book bag, keys, and phone. My car, though reliable, likes to flash its warnings. Check the engine. Sure, I’ll get to that later.
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Thirty-three miles is the distance from here to there. The music selection is an important task. You can drive 80 on this road without getting a ticket, but things slow down as I get closer. Over two years I have driven on this road without accident. Though, I have had several close calls.
Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it;
I wait at the stoplight for the turn. A left then a right, and I am finally there. Another morning, another day.
Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will;
I could worry, be fearful of what is to come. Not knowing if what the doctors say is working. I could check and monitor, see that nothing has changed; only causing panic when things have.
That I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him.
From where I stand, things are not black and white. Circumstances have color. Though it feels like I can control my morning, calculate its risks, I was never given the power of control in my life. Things aren’t fair. They never are, but I have the power of trust, the power of hope. I have the power of faith, and no one can control that for me. It’s in that faith, hope, and trust that I am able to give up control and live my life. Nothing was different today, just my same old routine. I was able to get through the morning; I am sure I can get through the day. So here I am, another morning, another day.
Forever in the next.
Amen





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