The tension keeps building
And with each exhalation of breath
Words so sharp and starving
Longing to break up the barrier
To devour the soul contained within
Afraid of the strong front
Needing to remain the glue
Too late for that now
It’s been a long time coming
And the time is here
For the war had begun
When the first bomb escaped your lips
When it blew the wall to pieces
To expose my raw skin
You’ve done this before
So there is no reason to believe you won’t again
History tends to repeat it self
Therefore I can no longer feel safe
In a place where we all want to run to
I must hide under my bed
Bite my lip and hide the tears
And they just keep coming
I never claimed to be perfect
But that is no reason for you to rip me apart
These threats strangle me
I keep loosing my breath
And with each look of pity
More tears keep coming
No one will let me forget
Especially not you
Such an elaborate lie I made up
I believed it myself
Gone in such denial
Simply because the truth was too surreal
I couldn’t bring myself to believe it
The truth hurt more than the marks it left
This time around I’m stronger
Still scared but stronger and not ready to forgive
Each fluctuation in your voice makes me quiver
It takes me back to that night
Throws me in front of the face I didn’t recognize
Couldn’t comprehend
With my body so numb
I couldn’t feel it
And that’s the truth
It didn’t hurt
My skin sliced open
The swellings grew in an instant
Bruised and tender
Surrounded by the pale skin recovering from shock
Exposed to the world and questioned
And with a smile on my face
Candles lit in my eyes
I responded…
I fell.