“Okay, I thought, what am I? I mean, what do I believe in? What do I represent? I really don’t want to believe in anything in the first place. Can’t I just have, I don’t know, facts? No beliefs? No faith? I would like that best, but if you’re just relying on facts, there’s not much you can say for certain. I mean, everything you hear is almost taken on faith. Someone says something on the news or the radio, some new research, you’re deciding whether it’s true based on how reliable you think the source is. In the end, it’s always possible it’s a total lie. You have to take it one some kind of faith, because, there’s always some doubt that goes along with it. Okay, so I have to have faith sometimes, even if I’d rather say I don’t.
“But what does that say then about beliefs? Don’t beliefs rely on faith? If I believe that there’re no supernatural things, I’m still going on faith, aren’t I? Even if that faith is based on science, which, you know, tries its best not to rely on faith. That’s why I’m not sure I’d want to be an atheist. That would be a belief.
“How about agnostic, then, I thought. They’re open to everything, not saying that anything’s actually wrong, and that someone else is right. I like that. I mean, of course some things to believe are wrong though. I think it’s more of a taking in other people’s opinions than saying that they’re all right. Even with that, you have to admit some of what people believe is wrong.
“Okay, so, either way, I have to believe in something. I mean, you can’t believe in everything, that’s basically believing in nothing. How about.... I don’t know.
“So, either way, you have to believe in something. I do believe some things are wrong and some are right. But, how do you know you’re right? If some things seem so obviously wrong or so obviously right, how can others think the exact opposite, just as strongly and surely as you do? Shouldn’t it just be, I don’t know, human nature, that the good things are known as good, and the bad things known as bad? I’m pretty sure other animals don’t have this going back and forth in their heads. I mean, besides figuring out the best way to survive. Should I cross the road or not? Run or freeze? Attack?
“Maybe that’s what we’re doing.
“Trying to just protect ourselves. Which works best for us? Are what these other people think beneficial to me or not? If I don’t like it, then, why not say it’s bad? I shouldn’t have to deal with something that makes me uncomfortable, that’s bad for me. Isn’t that what animals do? But, is it really worth it? I mean, trying to get rid of those things that might be threatening, that seems a little dangerous in itself.
“Believing in nothing probably makes it a whole lot easier to deal. But, you know, that’s impossible. I believe that I’m real, I’m talking to you at the moment, that’s real. I don’t really have any proof of anything, I mean I have science, but we could all be wrong, couldn’t we? Couldn’t we be wrong? Anything or everything we know could be totally untrue. What, it could. But if you do that, you’ll go insane, so I guess it makes sense to believe in something, for sanity’s sake.
“Well, do animals believe then, do they actually mull it over in their minds? Hey, is that tree really there? So, then, are those bright lights, like, dangerous?
“Anyway...I think it’s better to believe that there will be nothing than thinking there’ll be something. Less to stress out over. If you don’t think there’s anything there, then, you don’t have to be disappointed when there isn’t, or worry over which place you’ll end up. If it turns out there are different places to end up, at least you didn’t spend all that other time worrying about it. Because, I think that a lot of times the worrying ends up being worse than what actually happens. If that’s true now, it’s probably just as true later. Right?
“I mean, what do you think?”