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Contemplating on Conversion
Technically speaking, I’ve always been Catholic.
You know the deal - born and raised Catholic by default, then sent to a Catholic school due to my parents’ hopes of teaching me the morals of Jesus Christ.
In effort to steer away from arguments of religious belief, I will take a moment here to state that it’s okay to have strong faith in what you believe in...and to question your beliefs when your faith is not strong.
Anyway - I’m not entirely sure how this sudden fascination came about. Possibly the chronic loneliness I've recently been experiencing? My lack of contentment?
I’ve been researching principles such as the Eightfold Path to Enlightenment and asking all my Buddhist friends for their insight.
From what I understand, a main point in Buddhism is to rid yourself of unnecessary humanly desires. For example, the unnecessary desire to be loved. Us single people often feel the need to be admired. Yet ultimately, this desire only substitutes for the love that we lack to give ourselves.
My insides feel lighter already, simply by reading and meditating upon these certain paths that lead to being peaceful, calm, happy, balanced, and wise.
I feel uplifted - as though my soul, which was once greased and dirty with negative emotions, is now possibly undergoing the most powerful, energy efficient soul-wash ever.
There’s so much more to this religion that I can’t describe in words. The spiritual feeling of being so connected to the universe and being so mindfully steady is incredible.
But how would I tell my parents? What about all my rosaries and crosses? Do I really want to do this? The past 17 years of my life have revolved around Catholicism in one little way or another.
Making this conversion is more than just scrubbing away the religion my parents have chosen for me with a Magic Rub eraser. Even so, that would be a whole crapload to erase.
But hey, there’s no written rule stating that I have to decide now.
I’ll just bask in my newfound spirituality.