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How I found Wicca

I found Wicca when I was in the sixth grade. Ever since I was little I liked to watch anything that had witches or magic in it. I thought it was the most amazing thing in the world. I also read anything I could get on the subject with witchcraft and magic. I had a false sense of what Wicca was and I didn’t even know it was a actual religion until I read The Circle of Three series by Isobel Bird it amazed and shocked me that Wicca could be real. So sadly to say I started to search for spells on the internet. I thought spells could make me beautiful. I thought I could cast a spell like on Charmed or Sabrina the Teenage Witch and get what I wanted almost instantly. Good looks, better grades, someone to date, and to punish my enemies. I bet your shaking your head after reading that. Well I’m ashamed for even thinking that. I also was listening to what my family said at the time and they told me that Witchcraft was evil and those people worshipped the devil. So I listened to them and I continued to look up spells. My parents eventually found out what I was doing and told me I was praying to the Devil. The only reason I was Christian was throughout my life I was thought that if you weren’t Christian than you would forever be tormented in Hell with the Devil. So I was hesitant about looking up spells but I thought spells could make me a better person and I could make it up to Jesus later for praying to the Devil for just a little help. I wasn’t selling my soul to the devil I thought. So I checked out books about Wicca and every time my parents would catch me I told them I understood and would stop checking them out. For some reason even though I thought Wicca was evil at the time I couldn’t stop thinking about it and wanting to learn more. After a while I started to doubt my faith in Jesus and the Bible the more I listened to people talk about Christianity the more it felt wrong to me. I didn’t believe that people who weren’t Christian would automatically go to Hell. It just didn’t make sense to me. Also in sixth grade I started to doubt my sexuality. That scared me I thought I would go to Hell for sure. I hated myself for wanting to more about Wicca and I hated myself even more for doubting the religion my parents thought me. I just wanted to go to Heaven but in the back of my mind I still doubted the existence of a Hell let alone a Heaven. I felt that soon or later Jesus was going to punish me for my so called sins. I dint really have anyone to talk to about this. I felt dirty and sinful so I told no one. I checked out various books about Wicca from books about Herbs to books by Silver Raven wolf. I checked them out but rarely ever read them. I was just to scared to. I thought by doing so I was opening myself to the devil. This wasn’t just spells anymore it was the religion to hell. I read bits and pieces from the book but everything I read was proof of Wicca’s evil ways. It wasn’t until 8th grade that I read as much basic information about Wicca that I can from different websites I learned about the Wiccan Rede, The Lord and Lady, the Wiccan wheel of the year, The Threefold Law, and that’s the year I found Witchvox. I read so many essays from Teens that it made me feel like I wasn’t alone. Once I learned the basics of Wicca it felt right to me. I felt at peace. I realized that Wicca wasn’t evil and that it was meant for me to learn more about it. My parents wouldn’t allow that to happen. They told me that I had to go to Church that I was wrong and evil. My older sister even told me that I was going to go to Hell. I told them about Wicca and I told them what it wasn’t I tried telling her that in Wicca the didn’t believe in the Devil and that once you died that you would go to Summerland. Obviously they didn’t want to listen to me, they banned me from the computer and took away The circle of Three Series I checked out from the library. So I gave up Wicca again for a year. Yet during that year I kept thinking constantly about Wicca. I felt lost without it. Eventually I stopped thinking so much about it and I stopped trying to bring it up to my parents. After a while a person gets tired hearing that I was going to Hell and that I was evil and sinful and rebellious. I was tired of hearing that added to the problem that I came out as a Lesbian to them and was refusing to date males. I thought that I had it figured out but I was still so confused I wanted someone to help me learn more. I than decided to join social networks and chat groups for Wiccans. By doing this it made me feel less alone. Than in my ninth grade year my parents decided it would be a good idea to move from Chicago to Texarkana,AR. My older sister Brittany had graduated high school and was in college. So me and my siblings moved to the Bible Belt. Churches was everywhere and I was forced to attend the church and I hated every minute I was there. It seemed like the preacher was pointing out everyone’s flaw and what would be a sure way to Hell. I didn’t like the messages I heard. As I went though High School I tried to fit in by hiding my interest and being or trying to make my parents happy. There was a turning point in my life which I wont talk about in this essay but it made me realized that I wanted to follow the Wiccan path. Now I’ m a Senior in High school and I am trying to graduate. My parents’ and family still don’t accept my faith and wont let me practice it so I have to practice in secret. My parents said I can read about Wicca but not practice it but I will do both. I know Wicca is right form me. I have started a Book of Shadows and I am also going to buy a pentacle necklace on Tuesday. I am proud of being a Wiccan in training and I try to be polite and answer any questions people have when they ask me about my Faith. I will continue to try and learn more about my craft. Well I also would want to figure out my sexuality as well. I consider myself a Gothic Witch but I wont write to much about this, that will be for another essay. I hope this all makes sense of how I found Wicca.




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This article has 68 comments. Post your own!

Kristen_M said...
Jul. 19, 2011 at 10:39 pm:

I'm glad you wrote this. Many people have this feeling when it comes to Wicca, but I will tell you that Wicca is not the devil's work, nor is it evil. Wicca has only white magic and is tune with nature. Which is what I love most about it. I too have been fancinated with this kind of thing since I was in 4th grade. I've recently just started to learn Wicca about the end of last year so i am still learning as well.

Wicca to me feels so natural and I feel like I was ment to learn it. You ... (more »)

 
Sirie replied...
Jul. 28, 2011 at 12:03 am :
Asking someone to question if their respective religion is "right" is, indeed "bashing" their religion. This kind of behavior is what most people consider "shoving it down someone's throat." It makes potential seekers of your religion respect your religion even less for having such an intolerant view towards all outside beliefs.
 
Kristen_M replied...
Aug. 31, 2011 at 7:10 am :

Wicca feels natural to me. There were things about it that I already believed in before I even started reading about Wicca. I feel that I was connected to it my whole life until I really truly opend my mind to it. I do belive in Jesus and in a higher power, but Wicca is something more special to me.

I am Jewish on my mom's side of the family, but she grew up in a really strict Jewish life and she didn't want that for me. And to be honest I'm glad she felt that way because I don't want ... (more »)

 
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kennapie12 said...
Apr. 30, 2011 at 12:53 pm:
Your awesome for writing this! iM 13 AND A WICCANm, i may not be able to practice like someone in a bigger city, but i do as i can, im still concerned bout telling people but i do my best, im happy you have so much confidence, which gives me some! <3 =D   )O(
 
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xxbrittxx498 said...
Mar. 20, 2011 at 12:56 pm:
I'm a wiccan as well, and I think it's great that it has helped you so much.  The content of the article is good, but steps could be taken to organize it better and make it easier to read.  In paragraph form, your article would sound lovely.  Blessed be.  )O(
 
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XxKittyxX said...
Mar. 14, 2011 at 9:01 am:
Wow i love this.I am a Wiccan and I currently started studying it in 7th grade.I'm now 2 months away from highschool but I know that Wicca is the right religion for me.It makes me happy and I feel so much love and joy from it.
 
andromeda13 replied...
Aug. 22, 2011 at 3:53 pm :
same here. i foind wicca a couple months ago i've been studying it ever since. it bugs me how there are so many misinterprataions about Wicca. it makes me feel happy so it's the right path for me. )O( 
 
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Mayim12 said...
Mar. 5, 2011 at 6:55 pm:
Great article! I went throught a similar journey through Wicca. Long live witchcraft!
 
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deathward22 said...
Dec. 22, 2010 at 12:51 am:
beautiful piece, and i'm glad to see more people looking into Wicca
 
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WritingAngel20 said...
Dec. 19, 2010 at 11:26 am:

This is good, I'm interested in that stuff to but was afraid to try

 

 
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Wiccan_Liz said...
Nov. 7, 2010 at 12:30 am:

Don't worry you are not alone :) I am a young wiccan in highschool too. My parents wont let me practice wicca, so I also practice in secret, and I have been for the past three years. Every full moon I have a full moon ritual, and every holiday of the wiccan wheel I cast a circle. Along with all of this, I light candles everyday to thank the Goddess and God. The only one that accepts me is my boyfriend, and that is about it. One little tip...keep a book of your personal spells, because those a... (more »)

 
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lika_magpie.aka.radioactive83 said...
Oct. 14, 2010 at 10:28 am:
i agree with J.Rae. it would be good for this knowledge to be public.
 
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Phantom_Girl This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Aug. 31, 2010 at 6:33 am:

Being a Wiccan myself, I completely agree with your opinion, but your article needs work.

It is very poorly organized. Instead of one big, confusing block of words, you should try smaller paragraphs that really put your story in order. Nothing against you, just trying to help.

 
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J. Rae said...
Aug. 14, 2010 at 12:27 pm:
I am a Christian, but think that all of that evil and going to hell stuff is really misused. You should write an article that explains Wicca and tell ysus about it. It seems really interesting!
 
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toangelandcorinthian said...
Jun. 12, 2010 at 9:41 pm:

angelgal07 and corinthians, i was raised christian, and when one of my parents wouldn't take anything at all just to love me for who i was, when i prayed for him too, he never did.

last year on the fourth of july i met the most wonderful beautiful girl, with the most amazing personality in my life.

when i prayed to the christian god for almost a year, those alleged prayers that can move mountains didn't help me to see her again when i lost her phone number. dropped my phone with... (more »)

 
AngelGal07 replied...
Jul. 5, 2011 at 8:56 pm :
Ok let me tell you something. I've been a Christain for all of my life and there have been many times where God didn't answer my prayers but that was because he knew that it was best for me not to go down that road or it wasn't the time to do so. Then there have been many times also when God has answered my prayer eather in a matter of a day or a year later. Just because you didn't get what you want doesn't mean you have to result to whichcraft. You may be getting what you ever wanted now, but p... (more »)
 
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BlackKat said...
May 28, 2010 at 2:12 pm:
interviews with wiccans who are NOT evil.. http://www.longislandpress.com/2010/05/27/wicca-witchcraft-and-wizardry-on-long-island/
 
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Silevryn said...
Apr. 21, 2010 at 1:14 pm:

I am a pagan who also lives in the bible belt. I know how you feel, and im glad you overcame the problems that were keeping for from being yourself.

And something to tell those who claim you worship the devil: Saying a wiccan worships the devil is like accusing an anthiest of worshiping god.

 
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destinee said...
Mar. 30, 2010 at 12:04 am:

I'm not going to commnet on the article so much as the structure.

You're missing paragraphs. It's really difficult to read anything without paragraphs.

 
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CoNfUsEdInSaNiTy said...
Mar. 22, 2010 at 9:12 am:
Wicca isn't evil to those who use it properly, we do not worship the devil, or the god of hate like you said, its like there are jesus loving wiccans, I just choose to worship another god. wicca is for the most part, white magick. research about it a bit before you judge. it's not evil.
 
HisPurePrincess This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 1, 2011 at 6:01 pm :
sorry i can't agree.  God says witchcraft is of the Devil.  I agree with him.
 
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