Homo sapiens- the only surviving species of the genus “homo”. A miraculous, forever changing creature. In layman's terms, they are called Man, sometimes referred to as Human, they are the type that have reached the top of mountains, reached the thick of the arctic, where life is barely sustained- Men are incredible, and nothing can stop them from obtaining their goals.

Then, enter on God’s stage, the supporting role- the Woman. The Man’s best companion, a creature brought forth from Mans very own ribs- God came down from the heavens and from the Man’s perfect form, a form fit to perform any task set upon him, and god took such a bona fide Rib, a rib that would serve to make Man’s best servant, man’s best friend, and the vessel of which the human race would be carried on- these imperfect beings we call Women would be the carriers for the babies of such fine and exemplary creatures, women would be the subspecies to Man, doing God’s work as they birthed Men, perfect creatures, the chosen animal of this earth.

The Woman, not so easily understood as the perfect man might be, require time, patience, and research to comprehend. Their small, slight bodies and puny heads cannot think the same as us, and so to care for them properly it is the Man’s duty to understand their anatomy.

If you have recently come to have a wife, please take care to understand these key principles to a Women’s composure:

1. Once a month, women will succumb to insanity. They will bleed without rest, and it is best to ensure that nothing is provided to ease the pain. Remember: this is God’s punishment for Eve’s original sin.

2. Women are not intelligent enough to read or write. Please do not encourage this behaviour in your wife, it will merely deteriorate her quicker as a Woman’s feeble mind simply may not be able to handle such a task.

3. Women are at their best when homemaking, and not out working. They are simply too frail for hard labour, or long hours of any type of strenuous work. Encourage your wife to perform the easy and simple tasks such as child care, cleaning, sewing, and cooking.

4. Remember, Women respond best to dominance and command. Do not falter, your wife should listen and respect you. Never take no for an answer, even in the bedroom.

5. Women are highly emotional, and caution should be taken when dealing with them. Their brains are high wired to cry easily, and go through bouts of hysteria. Remember, hysteria treatments are always on option.

6. Your wife should strive to look her personal best, as it is a simple and good task to ask her to do. She should be able to handle pleasing you in such a way.

We hope this guide encourages good behaviour in your wives, and that you now better understand some of the composure in Women, the subspecies of Man.