A Request from the Righteousand Religious | Teen Ink

A Request from the Righteousand Religious

June 14, 2015
By Anonymous

Epidemics are breaking out in this era, even more treacherous than the Kardashians, #TheDress, and Twitter. These epidemics that are consuming lives of society at an exponential rate, are known as irreligiousness and atheism. The power of the elixir to all of human-kind, religion, is deteriorating as this “modern”-world havoc is uprising; so it is crucial  in this time, for the sake of everything, for all to follow the pathway of faith. To start, religion is the only thing in this world that teaches us how to love and to love only. In addition, the sole cause of all the good deeds done in the world is none other than the beautiful mythology taught by our old but gold books. Moreover, faith is what truly assisted countless when it came to curing their health and bodies, making health care and their costs, so yesterday. Furthermore, this doctrine is what ensures that an unnatural way of life and a detrimental societal structure, doesn’t become archetypal. For the sake of our confused world heading into a catastrophic dystopia, the beliefs systems and one and only solution the world needs to spin, must become a mandatory law followed by all citizens of the world.

If we all take a minute to reflect on all things related to religion, the one and only base is love for our fellow brothers and sisters! Have you ever seen a faithful person ever showing hate? Take the Westboro Baptist Church organization for example; their wondrous funeral pickets for sacrificial soldiers are all expressions of the love they feel for their dear country. Of course, it is meant to revive it from officially making an enemy of the All-powerful. I’m sure that Americans and the rest of the world are headed toward heaven if they absorb all the love being thrown in their faces. And even though different religions cause tension, segregation and has the ability to obfuscate good relationships between our human race in general, the common belief of love, beats all! To further the love that emanates from religion, the belief to shun the sin and not the person causes no person to ever be able to hate...but maybe simply want to vomit at the comdenmable actions of another...according to decrepit literature. This love is what comforts one after the loss of one’s child due to a disease or close friends and families lost in natural disasters with the justification of apparent sins they had committed in their past lives. It is so important to make all this overflowing and beautiful love a necessary law to abide by rather than a choice, since more than 14% of people in this planet still can’t comprehend its pulchritude. And if we all learned to love in this impeccable way, can you imagine how many good deeds would happen toward the better of humankind altogether?

By now, I think we can all agree upon the fact that with a gaping void in the “take” part of the give and take system, actions of kindness to benefit others are simply not worth it alone in the eyes of our self-centered race; we desperately require a prize to keep our eyes on. And there is no better way of prompting good deeds in this world other than religion which expertly uses the natural order of humans that want and need to get something in return for any action of “kindness”! Basing kind actions on a good heart is way too overrated these days; it is why you’ve never seen an irreligious person doing any good to the world. Take Ellen Degeneres for example, she couldn’t get any more narcissistic being an atheist!  If religion didn’t exist, all the motivation, given through a paradisiacal land in the afterlife for good deeds, would go down the drain at lightning speed. This makes it all the more imperative to enforce religion upon the rest of the world, that would result in everyone doing good deeds “for the better of the world”...even if it is not out of genuine desire for the sake of it. But don’t worry about the downfalls of the giving mentality such as finances because with religion, a drastic economic change will naturally present itself in your life! 

With religion as a mandatory belief, healthcare costs, and the stresses associated with it, will no longer pile onto our already complicated lives. It makes most sense to halt the trust we feel toward the propaganda of science and medicine and instead, leave our bodies and health in the care of a source much more powerful and dependable! Could you imagine the amount of trips to the gym, healthy grocery shopping and medicinal and health care costs you’d be saving up on? All that precious money could be wisely invested in our wondrous places of worship, to help fix that leaking roof, so we can comfortably pray for our health rather than taking responsibility for it using complete bogus calling itself “science.” Going with the economical choice always does the job right? The absurdly overrated healthcare scandals that manipulate unfortunate lives would become a predicament of the past! As our financial statuses skyrocket during this revelation, our doctors and those in the medical field might begin to get unemployed but no worries; there will be countless positions in the prestigious field of faith, ultimately boosting the entire nation’s and eventually the world’s economy! Unemployment on top of that will be of the past along with excruciating time spent in the medical and healthcare field! What better than a head-start into thriving economy to push forward a proper society overall along with it?

As with all epidemics, there is a domino effect of endless consequences slowly building upon our once disciplined society; the chaos created is nearing a critical breaking point that will unquestionably lead to Rick Santorum failing to becoming president...again. From the absurdity of blindly enforcing unnatural relationships that go against our eternal idea of “normal” and “correct”...indirectly to the overall viral contamination of the ubiquitous “liberal mind” nowadays, is undoubtedly an ever-spreading stain in society. Since we have already determined the fabrication of science, we can easily dismiss the proof associated with these unnatural and temporary phases people go through with “attractions” being “not a choice”; so we must make the next step by completely shutting it down in society all together with enforcing religion...and its implied ideologies. Think of all the extremely prosperous homophobic countries in the world where this phase is criminalized and religion is held up high and then imagine the utopia the world would become if we followed the shoe steps of these futuristic countries! It doesn’t matter in this case of course that there isn’t any explicit condemnation of these choices made by confused humans in any of our rulebooks because some things just are an exception to use our inferencing skills; that is what majority of us faithful people have been doing up to now anyways. As Pope Francis said, two humans getting married out of love for one another, not at all doing anything to hurt anyone else, will obviously threaten traditional families and societal structure altogether...just because. Yes, even more than heterosexual couples with the extremely low  divorce rate of 33%. When everyone believes in religion wholeheartedly without much of a choice(It’s for your own good!), we’ll become immune to all these unorthodox ideas of young adults who are confused; very much associated with irreligiousness and atheism. Along with becoming immune to these absurdities through faith, we will also naturally conform to the ideal society sticking to the tradition in which religion was created to the perfection it is today.

From the Christian Broadcasting System, derived of course from many of our holy books...obliquely by its followers, is a quote that says the powerful truth on the topic of “equality” and “feminism” going around lately, “Feminism encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practise witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become homosexuals.”, couldn’t have said it more practically and reflective of society myself Pat Robertson! If this and the number of followers this man has doesn’t show the importance of misogyny and a patriarchal set up, proudly sponsored by religion, I don’t know what would! Religion has always been one of the roots of suppressing women and that should continue to be the case except much strongly! It seems that the world is 5000 year behind as far as female equality rights all thanks to our doctrine of religion. Patriarchy still exists as a result of religion too! Ask yourself for a moment how we could eviscerate the thought of feminism all together along with setting back the creation of the antonym of patriarchy a couple more years if everyone followed the path of our propaganda...ahem, religion. We, at all costs simply must prevent the growth of the community, much resembling teenage idiocy as far as growth, which meshes two words, atheism and feminism, which are scary enough on their own, together. Once again, our belief system proves to be more efficient than double-pane temple windows since practising faith will be killing these two birds with one philosopher's stone;

With this plan that I’m presenting the world with on a golden platter, religion will soon stand next to Germany’s Hitler, Russia’s Stalin, China’s Mao, and DPRK’s Kim Il Sung as the most powerful saviour of the entire world from the disastrous direction we’re all heading in. Promoting affection toward our fellow brothers and sisters of the planet and completely eradicating hate will be the end result for humans when religion is followed by all. It truly is the one and only catalyst for our race to fill the world with acts of kindness for others around them that! The economy and all of the world’s financial circumstances, that were afflicted due to inevitable succumbence to the manipulating vortex of “healthcare”, will flourish and skyrocket like never before, without the need for those unnecessary and  uneconomical investments. Only legitimate relationships between humans will be present in the world when all abide by the words of the All-Mighty, finally appeasing Fred Phelps in heaven. The confused young ladies and gents who’ve fogged up their young noggin with ideas such as feminism will finally clear their minds to the natural order society was meant to be in, brought to you faithfully by our faith, which will inevitably lead this civilization to prosper. Through religion, we should show our obligation by believing that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, intellect and the rationale to use none of those when it comes to Him, as said by Galileo Galilei never.
Anyone who adds unto this will be punished.


The author's comments:

Personally, this was a risky take on a very controversial topic. I don't mean to insult anyone but rather surface some holes in a belief such as religion. Hope most will take this lightly and maybe even enjoy this form of writing and my voice here. 


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