Vulnerability to Me

By , elmwood park, IL
I'm glad that I can write this out because I am usually very shy and reserved. One of my biggest fears is being totally left out, being an outcast, or being judged or criticized constantly. I just hate the feeling of being alone or turned against.

Someone can easily hurt me because I am very sensitive. I'll cry at movies or even get furious at some character I'm reading about in a book! If someone did something that was mean to me, I can't just forget about it, I'll let it go into my head and it just stays. I need to change though, because it is a dog eat dog world out there and not everyone is a goody-two-shoes or is raised that same way as I did. Just the feeling of loneliness or emptiness makes me cringe just thinking about it. Also, being judged if you are different in any way gives me a bad feeling. It would be better if I let myself not care what everyone thinks of me. I think what makes me vulnerable to this is that I'm just too nice. I let people walk all over me. If someone is bothering me, I can't show my anger towards them because I feel like I'm being mean. I also hate the feeling of getting someone upset or making someone mad at me in return. I really don't want to hurt any one's feelings.

I can't always be like this because as I said before, everyone is different. In addition, it won't benefit me in anyway if I just keep my feelings bottled up inside of me because then one day, I might just explode... spilling out all of my thoughts that are meant to be kept to myself. Society has influenced a lot of people, for the good and the bad, making many vulnerable. All I can do right now is keep my head up and stay strong.





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