Satyrical Arguement

December 17, 2013
By Anonymous

For millions of years, one art form has continuously been one of the most popular and most loved of them all. Whether it’s accompanied by dance or something your mother jams out to on the way to work while you slowly sink down in your seat, hoping to give the impression that you don’t know her, music has brought people together. It has given individuals a common ground and wonderful entertainment, as well as being informative, deep and meaningful. Music is poetry after all.

Allow me to give some prime examples of today’s modern artists. These men, women, and everything else they may be, have effected people so passionately and so deeply that it has driven them to engage in thrilling activities such as unsafe sex, twerking, and even drugs with names so large they simply don’t have the mental capacity to understand them! Yes! These are the wonders of today’s perfect music in our near perfect society! Look at “Lil’ Wayne” for example, his music is so eloquent in its rhetoric, using words such as: “Brizzah,” “dat,” and “swag,” to convey a meaning far beyond the comprehension of our mediocre minds. With hit songs such as [censored] The World, [censored] Wit Me Now, and Fo’ Sheezy, Lil’ Wayne has successfully lowered the intelligence of all of his fans, therefore, proving that ignorance really is bliss, Fo’ Sheezy.

On the other end of the spectrum we have bands such as Rise Against who disgust true artists like Lil’ Wayne, Miley Cyrus, and Rick Ross with their support of the “It Gets Better Project” (a project aimed at preventing teen suicide and giving individuals the hope they need to live happy lives). With over population becoming such a huge problem, these selfless bands should be put to shame for their uplifting music and straight edge attitudes (for those intelligent enough to understand Lil’ Wayne, Straight edge means refraining from the use or alcohol, tobacco, and recreational drugs). I’m sure that Miley Cyrus feels strongly that projects like these are a waste of money that she could be spending on tongue enlargement and sexually assaulting things such as construction equipment, foam fingers, and people.

Recently there has been an epidemic sweeping across the nation. This delightful movement, commonly known as “YOLO-Swag” has brought such immense happiness to teens and pre-teens everywhere. Thanks to yet another magnificent artist, Drake, YOLO is the craving of everyone. As he said in his song, The Motto, “You only live once- that the motto [censored] YOLO.” That abbreviation is the pure reason the world is as it is today, why, everyone should really take a step back from their insignificant lives and just say “YOLO.” Why not give up on trying to help those who need us most and focus on ourselves more? See, if everyone was focused on themselves, then we’d all have everything we would want and wouldn’t have to waste out time trying to make other people happy, because we’re making ourselves happy! It’s the key to a utopian society!

The author's comments:
This work was one that was written for the sake of using satyr and is an attempt to better understand how to use grammatical styles such as sarcasm, puns, and wit.

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