A wounded heart

July 6, 2012
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Everytime i close my eyes, your face floats in. I try so hard but just cannot trash it in the bin. Those memories, those feelings, all come back in a haste. I try to fight against it but it ends up all a waste.
Who was I fooling when i told you that i didn't care about you anymore?
Man! I was such a w****.
But why the hell did you believe it?
Didn't you know that it was all s***?
You were the first guy I was head over heels for. Couldn't you see it in my eyes, even when i tried to lie?
I hope desperately everyday foe an unknown number to call me, so that i could call it back and be relieved to know that its yours.
But I should have guessed that you won't ever call me back. Guess you loved me so much, that you were ready to believe my lie.
The day that we broke up, my heart had split into two. And if its any consolation, you dropped your tears on it and it burned like hell. It still does.
I cry myself every night to sleep, yet i know that its you for whom i feel.
Now that you are gone, who is going to force me to eat so that i don't starve myself to death?
Who is going to call me up and tell me,"Hey dear, i love you. Muaaah",?
I miss how i used to be stuck to the phone with you on the other end for hours.
I miss it, badly!
My heart is still wounded and the scab isn't forming.
But i'm still smiling on the outside, but dying on the inside.
The pain of leaving you is spreading from my heart to the rest of my body like a pestilence.
It hurts. Hurts like hell. More than you can imagine. More than my fragile body is capable of bearing.
Now all i think about is how to make you think of me.
I'll do everything and anything to have you back, safe and secure in my arms.

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Camille1234 said...
Jul. 15, 2012 at 5:04 pm
It sounds so real like this really happen to you, if you did you shouldnt give up on him. If you feel this way abut him you should never give up on him that is real love
tam16 replied...
Jul. 16, 2012 at 12:25 am
thank you so much for your concerns, camille. trust me i reallly appreciate it. but its just something that happened to my soul sister and i was with her the entire time. she's younger to me and all her feelings were just so mixed up, so she requested me to write about it so that she could understand it better. she gsve it a shot in the end after the storm had passed, but unfortunately he proved to be another "one of those guys"....anyway, i'll tell let her know that someone cares. :)
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