Relationship Advice | Teen Ink

Relationship Advice

March 2, 2012
By AllyCat1394 BRONZE, Maplewood, Missouri
AllyCat1394 BRONZE, Maplewood, Missouri
2 articles 0 photos 0 comments

As teenagers, we believe life revolves around ourselves. We spend all of our time slacking in school, hanging out with our friends, and doing crazy things. Part of all the insanity we try to find someone who can make us happy through all the mess. The thing is, teenage relationships are failing. I see it all the time in school and on TV. We are doing something to screw everything up. To try and prevent relationships from failing, I have a list of tips; relationship advice.

First, look at your boyfriend/girlfriend and think about what you want from them. If all you want from them is a physical relationship then I don’t think you need to be in a relationship. Girls are, generally, in it for more, while boys may think a little differently. If you think that you want to make your partner happy, then I think you are on the right track. A relationship is selfless. You think about the other person and hope to make them happy before you worry about yourself. If you look at your relationship in that light, you might be more successful. If the person you are with isn’t what you want, then break up. Don’t lead them on for selfish reasons. If they are what you want, give it a try. Be patient with it.


Second, good relationships last for a while. You have to look at your girlfriend/boyfriend and picture yourself with them in a year, maybe two. Are they worth keeping in your life for so long? You don’t have to picture yourself marrying them in the future, just think in a year or so. Most people don’t get married until they are out of college, so you don’t have to think that seriously. Relationships don’t always last forever, but sometimes they do. So, don’t waste your time with someone you don’t think you will truly love or aren’t worth spending so much time with.


Third, you should never lie in a relationship. You should always be open with your boyfriend/girlfriend and tell them the truth. I’m not saying that if you think what they are wearing is ugly to go out and say it. Find a way to tell them without hurting their feelings. Also, never tell a girl that she is fat, even if you are joking, because on the outside they may laugh it off, but on the inside they take it offensively. There is a line that you need to be careful not to cross when you are joking or complimenting. Something could be offending to either one of you, and that would take all the fun and meaningfulness out of joking or complimenting.


Fourth, trust is key to a successful relationship. Jealousy is not needed in a relationship. If someone tells you that your boyfriend/girlfriend is good looking you should take that as a compliment. You have someone who other people think is good looking, and you have him/her. You have the person that people are envious of. You both need to be able to go out on your own without each other. You both need to have your own friends that you can hang out with, without thinking that your boyfriend/girlfriend is out somewhere with some other person. If they tell you that they aren’t out with someone else, then you should listen to them. Also, if someone tells you a rumor about your girlfriend/boyfriend, ask them about it. Don’t assume that the rumor is correct because it might actually be a lie. You need to be able to trust each other so that there are no negative feelings and that you can be away from each other without being suspicious. You may be in a relationship, but that doesn’t mean that you need to be together every waking moment.


Fifth, be spontaneous. Relationships get boring if you do the same thing all the time. Every once in a while surprise your boyfriend/girlfriend with a little gift. Take him/her somewhere new. Blindfold them and take them somewhere they would like. Go to the amusement park or go mini golfing. Do something fun and unexpected to keep everything fun. Do something romantic. Plan a picnic or make dinner together. Keep the flame that you have burning. If your relationship gets boring, of course they are going to look for something new and different that isn’t you.


Sixth, be respectful, and not just to your boyfriend/girlfriend, but to their friends and family too. You have to think about their feelings. Many times, there is information shared with a boyfriend/girlfriend that is confidential. You have to respect that they told you that and keep it to yourself and don’t use it against them. You have to respect their friends and family because if you disrespect them you would make your boyfriend/girlfriend upset. Plus, if you are respectful to their parents, the more likely they are to like you. If they like you then they will trust you to take out their boyfriend/girlfriend. You have more chances to do things with them. If you respect them they will respect you and you will be on good terms with everyone. This will make your relationship stable.

Seventh, the relationship has to be more than just physical. If all you want in the relationship is the physical stuff then a relationship isn’t for you. The person you are with also has to be seen as more than just your boyfriend/girlfriend. They have to be your best friend too. You need to be able to do things other than just cuddle in bed. You need to be able to go to the park and play catch. You need to be able to play video games with each other. You need to be able to hang out with a huge group of friends with out being all over each other. You need to be able to talk about everything and anything with each other. Relationships go further than just skin deep, they go all the way to your heart. Your boyfriend/girlfriend should know everything about you, all of your secrets and your experiences. The more you know about each other and the more you can act as best friends, but also boyfriend and girlfriend, the better off you will be.


Relationships are not easy–everyone knows that–but if you really try to make it work, then things will work out in the end. If you feel that things aren’t working between the two of you, then just end it there. Don’t lead them on if you know you are going to fail. In order for you to be happy with each other you need to be able to trust in the other. They need to be the person that you can go to for everything. A relationship can be very fragile, but if you work hard on it and are confident in it, then you can have a very strong relationship. If you really want your relationship to work, then take into consideration the advice I have given you. Hopefully it will benefit you in the end.


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