I’ve been making some mistakes these days, the kind of mistakes you can hardly fix. The kind of mistakes that makes you feel bad, desperate, and lost. So I desperately need some inspiration to figure out this confusing status I’m being through. I’ve been looking for inspiration for a very long time but I’m done waiting for it to fall from above I’m just going to force it and release too much things I kept inside. The first thing I’m gonna talk about is my sentimental life which is not that bright. My lack of experience is not done yet with ruining my life and my so beloved peace of mind. Being alone if it’s the appropriate word has never been a problem it is still not. I got a chance to move to the next level but I just screw it up like I always do, thank god my feelings are not involved so the pain will be easily forgotten but my pride has been hit once again! The second problem or mistake related to that one is my friendship to someone that might get upset from my constant complaining behaviour so I think the best thing to do is to take some space from this entire social emotional environment. The other problem which is not really a mistake is my mood. It’s always changing. There are people I prefer to avoid and others I need to be with (should I specify that those I need to be with are part of my previous problem?). In the other hand inspiration has completely disappeared and gone very far from my way but I think this essay is going to fix up things. Now the real and very dangerous and big problem is related to all the previous troubles and mistakes I’ve made: I DON’T KNOW WHAT I WANT. I missed a great relationship because I didn’t know what I want, I kind of screw a nice friendship because I kept over thinking about the consequences of some of my foolish acts, my mood is as unstable as my thoughts because I do actually have no idea about what I want and last but not least inspiration such as myself confidence have been I don’t know where but definitely not around.
All I need
February 5, 2012