Why Teen Sex Is Totally Fine

August 19, 2011
By ambnyc SILVER, Rego Park, New York
ambnyc SILVER, Rego Park, New York
6 articles 0 photos 133 comments

Favorite Quote:
You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. - Dr. Seuss


The other day, I was chatting with one of my best friends. She mentioned casually that she was going to have sex, for the first time, with her boyfriend of four months.

A bit taken aback, I asked, "Are you... ready?"

"Yes," was her simple reply. We moved on, switched topics, started talking about something else.

The problem with this situation is that it doesn't happen often enough.

In America, teenage sex is made out to be a Big Deal. This is due largely to the religious undertones of our nation, of God-fearing people who adhere to the Bible's call for abstinence. I feel as if I need to remind everyone that America is not a theocracy. Thus, any conservative religious values should not be imposed upon us. People are allowed to have their own opinions, yes; but they fail to see that sex is a natural part of human life. As natural as breathing, eating, sleeping. Teenagers are just as human as any of us -- so why, then, should sex be denied to us based solely upon our age?

True, a lot of our decisions are made spur-of-the-moment. The adolescent brain is still largely developing. As a result, all adolescents are generalized against, morphed into shady, flaky characters who cannot be trusted to think for themselves. Of course, this means that other authoritarian figures should think for us, decide for us.

...Right? Wrong.

Having sex is not a Big Deal. True, it comes with many strings attached. People often use the "teenage pregnancy" argument. The solution for this is simple: educate our children in the practice of safe sex. Condoms and birth control work wonders. Those who preach abstinence fail to realize that, even if they tell their kids not to have sex, the kids shall do it anyway. Since when has telling teenagers not to do something ever worked? As teenagers, we feel a need to grow independent, break away from our parents, to rebel. If we are forbidden to do something, obviously we are going to engage in it.

Sexual intercourse is not bad, evil, or "unpure", as it is often made out to be. It is, in fact, quite the opposite. Sex elevates your mood, induces euphoria, satiates your innate need for it, satisfies your hormones. You are not obligated to have sex with someone you're in love with. You can have sex with whoever you want, wherever you want, whenever you want. Sex and love are not interchangeable. While it is, in fact, a wonderful experience to have sex with someone you are in love with, it shouldn't be restricted to only that.

It all rests upon the individual's choice. The choice you make to have sex or to not have sex, to have sex with someone you love or to have sex with ten different people you like. And there's nothing wrong with either of those options. Most, if not all, humans will have multiple sexual partners in their lifetime. Just because you're in your teenage years doesn't mean you're somehow not entitled to the perks that the rest of humanity is.

Another argument against this is that you should "wait until marriage." That somehow, having sex violates the perceived "sanctity" of marriage. Yes, this is yet another illogical belief fostered by religious motivations. We are supposed to turn against our natural instincts for... what? To be "pure"? Why is abstinence the symbol of "purity"? Furthermore, why should it be? And why should anyone be obligated to adhere to it, just because someone else says so?

Frankly, if you're going to have sex and you're a teenager, I wish you luck. There's nothing wrong with it -- not in the least. All I am advocating is to do it safely: use condoms, always, and birth control, if possible. Make sure that neither you or your partner have any STIs. Make sure that you are comfortable enough with your partner to engage in intercourse. And I can assure you that everything will turn out fine.

The author's comments:
Seeing an article on here about why teen sex is "wrong" made me realize just how many people are misled and uneducated about the realities of teen sex.

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This article has 29 comments.


on Jul. 9 2013 at 2:18 pm
sunnyhunny PLATINUM, Litchfield, New Hampshire
22 articles 3 photos 329 comments

Favorite Quote:
"An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind."
-Ghandi

I am really glad to see this article!  You are very articulate and I like that you included arguments that people might have against you.  I beleive that s.ex before marriage is totally OK.  I don't necessarily think that we should go around and have s.ex with just anybody, because there can be emotional ramifications.  I know that you weren't implying that people should do this, but rather saying that we should be less judgemental of others for their sexual decisions.  I like your open-minded approach, and this is very well-written.   -Leah 

. said...
on Oct. 31 2012 at 4:31 pm
This is extremely well-written and I agree completely! I think there should be more people like you defending teenager's free choices! Great piece.

on Aug. 26 2012 at 8:12 pm
Alice-Love BRONZE, Indianapolis, Indiana
1 article 0 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don't cry because it's over, but smile because it happened

You're writings good. But I totally disagree with you. No offense but you've inspired me to write an essay on why it's wrong. Check it out if when I'm done. : )

ambnyc SILVER said...
on May. 3 2012 at 9:34 pm
ambnyc SILVER, Rego Park, New York
6 articles 0 photos 133 comments

Favorite Quote:
You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. - Dr. Seuss

 Thank you very much!

on May. 3 2012 at 9:15 pm
spirtualpersonification BRONZE, Glenview, Illinois
2 articles 0 photos 35 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Nothing is impossible, the word impossible says i am possible" - Audrey hepburn <3

This is an amazing persasuive essay, very detailed and well though out. Even though I only agree with you to a certain extent... I found the artcile very persasive Great Job:)

ambnyc SILVER said...
on Feb. 12 2012 at 8:15 pm
ambnyc SILVER, Rego Park, New York
6 articles 0 photos 133 comments

Favorite Quote:
You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. - Dr. Seuss

I agree. :)

ambnyc SILVER said...
on Feb. 12 2012 at 8:14 pm
ambnyc SILVER, Rego Park, New York
6 articles 0 photos 133 comments

Favorite Quote:
You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. - Dr. Seuss

It's okay, I won't jump on you for having a divergent viewpoint (I appreciate the debate it causes). Could you tell me why you disagree with the article?

on Feb. 10 2012 at 4:06 pm
R5andParamore BRONZE, Manalapan, New Jersey
2 articles 0 photos 67 comments
*serious, sorry

on Feb. 10 2012 at 4:03 pm
R5andParamore BRONZE, Manalapan, New Jersey
2 articles 0 photos 67 comments
I don't agree with this article at all. I'll tell you why when I calm down, because it will sound all jumbled and confusing if I try to explain myself in this state. Im just really scared and frazzled, because I see now that this issue is really serioys. I didnt know so many people agreed with this kind of behavoir. I just need to clear my head for a minute. Im sorry, but you have amazing writing skill, I have to say, I just don't agree with your opinions

ambnyc SILVER said...
on Jan. 19 2012 at 4:13 pm
ambnyc SILVER, Rego Park, New York
6 articles 0 photos 133 comments

Favorite Quote:
You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. - Dr. Seuss

Thank you very much!

on Jan. 19 2012 at 11:21 am
spirahemmanuelle BRONZE, Jonestown, Texas
1 article 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
"food is medicine" - hippocrates

This is a wonderful article! I completely agree with it in every way. Rock On, you're a great writer, and you express your opinions very well!

ambnyc SILVER said...
on Nov. 30 2011 at 6:40 pm
ambnyc SILVER, Rego Park, New York
6 articles 0 photos 133 comments

Favorite Quote:
You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. - Dr. Seuss

Sorry if I've made you feel alienated in any way! I appreciate any and all feedback, differing viewpoints, and debates on my article. I agree that meaning is also an important factor in s.ex, but whether someone chooses to have it with meaning or not, well, that's their choice.

on Nov. 30 2011 at 6:17 pm

Where did you hear me say that it's full of disadvantages. Again, I repeat: I am not condemning s.ex. On the contrary, I think it's a wonderful thing, and I don't believe people must be married to be in a s.exual relationship.

Health benefits are not the same as meaning; neither is pleasure.

But I suppose I have polluted ambnyc's article enough to keep repeating myself.


on Nov. 23 2011 at 7:17 pm
camohunter19 GOLD, Sedro-Woolley, Washington
14 articles 13 photos 128 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Girls are so queer you never know what they mean. They say No when they mean Yes, and drive a man out of his wits for the fun of it." "Violence is never the answer! It is a question, and the answer is yes."

It's all about picking up a pencil and writing. Without words, the world is a lost cause.

ambnyc SILVER said...
on Nov. 23 2011 at 7:07 pm
ambnyc SILVER, Rego Park, New York
6 articles 0 photos 133 comments

Favorite Quote:
You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. - Dr. Seuss

Thank you logicoflove, I agree.

ambnyc SILVER said...
on Nov. 23 2011 at 7:06 pm
ambnyc SILVER, Rego Park, New York
6 articles 0 photos 133 comments

Favorite Quote:
You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. - Dr. Seuss

Thank you! Yeah, I got tired of all the "s.ex is bad, blah blah blah" articles. I think it's perfectly fine.

on Nov. 23 2011 at 6:05 pm
camohunter19 GOLD, Sedro-Woolley, Washington
14 articles 13 photos 128 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Girls are so queer you never know what they mean. They say No when they mean Yes, and drive a man out of his wits for the fun of it." "Violence is never the answer! It is a question, and the answer is yes."

Wow, good writing, good article. I liked how somebody finnally took the side of of the ones "doing it". Not that I would, but I hate how most of the articles say certain things are "bad", I know they are opinions and but still...

Anyways good work! You are very talented.


on Oct. 29 2011 at 2:33 pm
thelogicoflove SILVER, Camden, South Carolina
7 articles 0 photos 15 comments
It may seem meaningless to you, but that isn't always the case. S.ex is pleasurable. There are also many health benefits, such as reducing insomnia, burning calories, strengthing muscles, pain and stress relieving,  and even improving the health of your skin. Just wanted to play the argument that s.ex isn't completely full of disadvantages.

ambnyc SILVER said...
on Oct. 5 2011 at 7:55 pm
ambnyc SILVER, Rego Park, New York
6 articles 0 photos 133 comments

Favorite Quote:
You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. - Dr. Seuss

Yes, I agree with that final statement.

on Sep. 30 2011 at 6:18 pm
Thesilentraven PLATINUM, Mableton, Georgia
40 articles 2 photos 1635 comments

Favorite Quote:
"il piu nell' uno," (according to Emerson, an Italian expression for beauty)

"Unable are the loved to die, for love is immortality" ~Emily Dickinson

"The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain"
~Kahlil Gibran

That's fair of you to say.

Yes, there certainly is a right.

But, I hope you don't mind my saying, that just because there is s.exual desire doesn't mean that it should instantly be satisfied. But, of course, if anyone feels differently, they have absolute freedom to do as they wish.



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