the love war

March 30, 2011
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I can’t stop blaming myself for something I made to my own. I’ve hurt myself by my own hands or should I say my own heart. I loved someone...No...THE ONE who brought my heart to its knees, he made me feel bad, made me fall in love slowly and painfully…THIS ONE who doesn’t know even my feelings about him or simply my name haunts my dreams and my thoughts. I can’t blame him for what’s happening to me because my heart is the only responsible. What else can I say? Is the fact of saying, that the beholder of the blue eyes holds my heart enough to resume the situation? Certainly not! I’m in such a situation that makes me feel guilty of loving someone…THE ONE. The worse is that I’m not even sure about what I feel...I love I don’t...Yes I do…no I don’t…and this sound? I hear something; I think that it’s…yes it is: my heart is bleeding! Shame on him; after all it is worth what’s happening to him, it involved itself in love affairs and now I have to pay for it.
He is so high, up in the top and I’m down looking to the top that’s getting far from me. I don’t want to waste anyone’s time especially mine or his but there is something else that I don’t want at all: I DON’T want his heart to beat for another one. THIS ONE who will feel his love and not me, who’ll taste the happiness of love and life and not me. THIS ONE who’ll get HIM and notme. I might be selfish but I’m not the kind of girl that suffers for someone else happiness. If the destiny says that nothing is going to happen between us, if she says that the fire of my heart will extinguished, if to her my love is a big mistake that must end, well there’s nothing else I can do except to submit. But after all the pain that I’ll feel all the tears that I won’t cry, I’ll survive. Each time I’ll see him with the ONE who owns his heart mine will bleed, it will beg me to end its beatings, it’ll cry until dying but I’ll get him alive back because to me it is still dead and it won’t really beat until it meets the one who’ll make sense to its beatings and that day I’ll win the war of love.

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Souad HAMIDI said...
Apr. 12, 2011 at 1:11 pm
waw your story is awesome I love it keep writing  wish you all the best
tepamoro replied...
Apr. 26, 2011 at 12:00 pm
thank you miss don't worry i have a lot to say!!!
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