Are the Best Relationships Results of Friendships?

July 30, 2010
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How many times have our peers, our teachers, or our parents told us that the best relationships come from great friendships? Most of us have gotten this advice on several occasions when our love lives seem to be going nowhere. But can this advice be trusted or is it simply just a myth? For some lucky people, this advice may turn out to be true, but from my experience it’s just a myth. Two years ago, I met this guy in my chorus class he was smart, attractive, and athletic- and basically everything I was looking for in a guy. We hit it off right away and soon became very good friends. Before we knew it, the school year had ended and even though we were sad to leave each other, we agreed to stay in touch over the summer. Lucky for us, we both made school sports teams and had to stay in our state for the summer. Every minute that we weren’t at practice; we spent hanging out, going to the movies, or talking on the phone. Needless to say our friendship remained strong and continued to reach new heights. When the new school year started, our friendship hit its peak. We started to think of each other as more than friends, and after a lot of time and consideration, we couldn’t find a reason not to date. Soon we were an item and quickly becoming the school’s cutest couple. Unfortunately, this bliss was short lived. After the first couple of dates, things started to get awkward, and by the fourth date, we still hadn’t kissed. Now I hadn’t had much experience with boys, but I knew that this wasn’t normal. When I confronted my new boyfriend about this, he said something that crushed me. He told me that he couldn’t think of me as more than a friend and that he couldn’t kiss his best friend. I was deeply hurt, and to my dismay our friendship had been tarnished. Even though all our friends and family had told us that the best relationships come from friendships, our relationship hadn’t worked out. So you decide, can this advice be trusted or is it just a myth?

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Dawn said...
Aug. 10, 2010 at 1:06 pm
I beleive this is true i dated a guy and we were'nt friends we didn't do anything and were always unconfrontable around eachother and i hated it. i am now dating a guy that we were awsome friend before.. we played football together and did other fun things as friends. on valentines day he decided to ask me out. we a couple now but were eachother's best friends still. it's the best relationship i have ever been in we've been together for alomst 6 months now and were still together. i'm sorry abou... (more »)
pageturner This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Aug. 8, 2010 at 10:57 am
It's a fifty-fifty thing. Sorry you got the bad end of the deal. But I know a lot of people who say that their wife or husband is their best friend. If you don't believe me you should see my parents. After 27 years, and my dad still brings my mom flowers everyother week.
KatieGrey This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Aug. 5, 2010 at 9:14 pm
I've been dating my best friend since the end of my sophomore year in high school. We didn't kiss until three months after we started dating. It's going on a year and a half now and we've been great. After reading your article, I feel like maybe you didn't give him enough time to get used to the idea. Or maybe he felt rushed but any way I hope you continue your friendship with him because I think it still has a lot of potential.
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