“Do you believe everyone had their ‘match,’ the person they were/are supposed to be with?” questioned and dawned upon me, from someone very special to me. I did; I really believed those words with all my heart once, until certain past incidences happened. These incidences made me realize and believe in new concepts, which supported my, at the time, newly found beliefs.
Without a doubt, it is possible to love more than one person in one person’s lifetime, or possibly, at once. Then again, maybe at that point the feelings aren’t love at all – which brings me to my next concept: It’s indeed possible to fall out of love just as easy as it can be to fall in. But for the most part, with few exceptions in one person’s life, you always carry a piece of that past love in your heart; you always carry a piece of that person within you. Which makes me fear, what if One Person is meant for Another Person, but that Another Person decides he/she isn’t meant for the One Person as well? One Person is left loveless, always meant to be with Another Person whom they cannot have. When realizing this, One Person may go their entire life never finding love again, never willing to open their eyes to it, because they have already found their meaning. Another purpose their meaning has though. Another Person has another purpose.
When you’ve had your heart broken as severe as I have, little hope of the concept of forever is left. Which leads me into: without trying to find and make your “match” work, you’ll never have one. You have to try with every ounce of your broken or wholesome body, use all your shields to block out the bad and harmful – the fights and rough times – but what if your shield has been shattered? What if you’re broken and bruised? What if your pieces are missing and left within the fists that swung the blows against your shield? What if, you never get them back?
How do you fight for something so great without any army or armor?
We’re all walking into an open battlefield with love, but do we realize how true that really is?
I do long for the day I am proven wrong: the day I think back to myself, “God, Leilani, you were so closed-minded and hard-hearted; don’t you realize you’re living your life with the one and only person you’re Meant to be with? The other’s were just obstacles, challenges, foul trials, guiding you onto this hard-to-sheer-upon road. Gravel laid is fresh, and your car might tip, but here you are, proving – it’s worth – the while.” But what if I never reach that point?
After all, there is a 51% divorce rate nowadays. So, even when I think I have found my “match,” my meaning, I will not know, until I am laying in my death bed, and thinking, “He was the one.”