Dear friends:



First, I’ve noticed that many teenagers feel like they have to be dating someone to be happy. Maybe its for personal satisfaction, or just to be able to say they’re with someone or for the slime balls out there…maybe its just to get “some”. I’m not saying it doesn’t happen, but I’ve only seen a few couples that are together, where both parties are with each other simply because they enjoy each others company. I also think its ridiculous, to say “I love you” after dating someone for two weeks. If not for any other reason, it takes credit away from the couples who have had to work at their relationship. Under no circumstances, do I believe in love at first sight. It takes conversation, dedication, and more importantly it takes time. Something I’ve learned is love and pain go hand and hand, and you can’t fully experience one without the other. Here’s my suggestion, don’t claim to love someone, until you know exactly what makes them, THEM.


Second, why do some guys feel the need to say things they don’t and never meant? It can be the smallest comments, but sometimes those are what make the biggest impacts. For example, “I don’t care what movie we see, as long as I’m with you.” Or “baby, you’re the only one for me” or my favorite, “I’m with you for you, nothing else matters” I’ve heard these lines so much that now when I hear them, my ears automatically translate them into “bullcrap, bullcrap, BULLCRAP!” Here’s my suggestion, don’t’ say what you don’t mean, because someday, somewhere, someone might actually believe you.


Third…whoa, here comes the big one. SEX. Its been said that guys use love to get sex and girls use sex to get love. Sad thing is, is a lot of relationships are based on just this. My opinions are not based on experience but instead, observation. A lot of my friends sleep around and then later on wonder why it didn’t work out. By no means am I’m saying sex is bad, I’ve just noticed that when it happens to soon, it short circuits other parts of a relationship. People can relate on many different levels -- emotionally, spiritually, physically, and mentally but when sex happens to soon it can and often does become the main focus, and every other part of the relationship, such as talking, becomes irrelevant. I also noticed when this happens, guys tend to lose respect for the girl and girls start to mistrust the guy. Here’s my suggestion: Don’t have sex until you’re married. Make someone prove they love you, because words can only go so far.


Finally, I am not a shrink, nor do I have any formal education concerning this subject; I’m just an average Joe and these are my observations and opinions. I’ll leave you with this last suggestion, sit back, relax and enjoy the ride. You have your whole life to fall in love, but right now, what matters is you. You’ll never be satisfied with someone else until your satisfied with yourself.