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A Modest Proposal: A Satirical Solution for Gun Control

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FOR PREVENTING THE ESCALATION AND LONG TERM PERPETUATION OF GUN RESTRICTIONS


It is a melancholy object to constrict those who own guns with overbearing rules, and laws. The problem with mass shootings and homicides will only escalate with more convictions over guns. I think it is agreed by all parties that the life threatening occurrence of mass shootings and homicides committed against innocent defenseless people is a heinous  act carried out by evil people. But my intention is far from being confined to provide only for the the betterment of separating, dividing, and “locking down” the direct cause.


As to my own part I have studied the proposals of other projectors and concluded that they are not nearly as efficient as they claim to be such as eliminating guns completely which causes innocent people to be more susceptible to injury or death by the hands of a person with  an illegally obtained weapon. If this issue continues to grow without being addressed by society as a whole the problem will never be solved and more awful occurrences will happen. The best outcome is no more injuries or deaths and a total compromise between the two schools of thought when it comes to this issue.


I will now present my own idea, which I hope will not be subject to any disagreement.


I humbly offer it to the public consideration that humankind as a cohesive and cooperative unit should provide gun owners with a totally safe option of storage that benefits themselves and the community as a this is the best option for compromise because it appeases both parties


In this scenario gun owners would be required by law to securely store their guns in pieces, with each piece being contained in its own separate box, this is the best option because it appeases both parties (verbal irony, because obviously both parties will not be appeased). Of course in the case of an intruder the owner must first call the police, inform their is an intruder and also tell them they plan on using lethal force to protect themselves, after they have done that they can then proceed to gather their separate gun pieces and assemble them for use in an orderly, time consuming fashion.


These drastic and sudden changes may be hard to implement because gun owners of course are not law abiding citizens (incongruity, because not all gun owners are non law abiding citizens) but looking beyond this the plan should be implemented and we should teach those with opposing views to peacefully accept it by using force to instill these ideas. The benefits are endless starting with the increased sale of small safes to the reduction of gun violence overall.


I can think of no valid objection that may be introduced to antagonize this proposal even the thought off the owner not having enough to accomplish these steps in a constricted amount of time but anyone owning a gun should meet the criteria to accomplish these tasks in time and if they don't then why should they even own a gun? (sarcasm, because it's meant to poke fun at anyone contesting this proposal)  Again no one should dare to suggest these notions to me until they have a small spark of hope that these actions may be implemented. It is not that i do not respect the input of others on the subject of solutions to this topic, but simply that i have searched far and wide for far too long to create an implementable solution to this great nation's growing problem.

 

This is the only solution that will work because it is the only one that begins to involve a more than fair compromise to gun advocates and those against gun ownership, one that is completely unbiased.
 




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