Dolores Dump

December 16, 2008
By Noelle Beck SILVER, Waldoboro, Maine
Noelle Beck SILVER, Waldoboro, Maine
8 articles 0 photos 0 comments

Dolores Dump was not a dump nor was she dumpy looking. Her father Bert Dump changed the family last name to dump because he owned a dump and wanted more publicity. Dolores liked to think about true things, but whenever she tried someone would put a cardboard box over her head and throw her in the closet until she stopped thinking about true things.
You see, Dolores lived in the town of Dontthinkville, where it is illegal to think (true things). Dontthinkville is also known as planet Earth, where people are genetically programmed not to think true thoughts. So they never do. Meaning human nature has drawn a veil over reality. Only, once in a while someone is un- programmed and they start to think real thoughts about real things. (Like Dolores) Real things scare people so they try to get rid of them. Dolores’ father tried to put her through a paper shredder, but he decided having an unprogrammed child was better than ruining his paper shredder. He was reasoning there, not thinking. Reasoning increases personal utility, while thinking about true things lies in the expanse outside, but including the personal. Those who think real thoughts come to real conclusions. All real thoughts fall under one real conclusion. Same as all fake thoughts, fall under one fake conclusion. The distinctions must exist for anything to exist. Or else all negates itself as nothing. For Dolores to exist there must be the possibility for her not to exist. If one is not possible neither is the other. Everything becomes everything else and words become unnecessary because they suggest distinction as well. At night Dolores sleeps, because night is distinctly different than daylight.
The presence of thinking is verified by the presence of not thinking. Dolores’ dog is dead due to a drunk ice-cream man, because Dolores’s dog was something distinctly different than dead at one point in time.

Last night, Dolores was caught on an old cot in Bert’s junkyard thinking about God. Bert got very mad and finally did paper shred her. Dolores is okay, though, because she is somewhere distinctly better than Dontthinkville or planet earth.

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